1
00:00:40,831 --> 00:00:42,166
On the count of three.

2
00:00:42,416 --> 00:00:46,170
One, two, three!

3
00:00:47,839 --> 00:00:50,758
Try the ring toss. Three for a quarter.
Look how easy it is.

4
00:00:50,925 --> 00:00:53,261
There you go, a winner!

5
00:00:53,302 --> 00:00:57,098
And now, for my shocking finale.

6
00:00:57,265 --> 00:00:59,684
Not for the squeamish.

7
00:00:59,809 --> 00:01:03,104
Not for the faint of heart.

8
00:01:03,855 --> 00:01:08,150
I call my trick "The Jaws of Death. "

9
00:01:10,111 --> 00:01:12,613
Now. Say it. Say it.

10
00:01:12,738 --> 00:01:16,367
Harold, use your awesome might
to save me from this hopeless plight.

11
00:01:16,617 --> 00:01:19,078
No harm will come to you.
Alakazam!

12
00:01:26,460 --> 00:01:28,296
Help me! Help me!

13
00:01:41,184 --> 00:01:42,894
I'm going to be an actress.

14
00:03:34,755 --> 00:03:36,757
Hard to believe it was last Christmas...

15
00:03:36,841 --> 00:03:38,843
...that me and Harmony
changed the world.

16
00:03:38,926 --> 00:03:42,763
And we didn't mean to.
And it didn't last long, you know.

17
00:03:42,889 --> 00:03:44,223
A thing like that can't.

18
00:03:44,432 --> 00:03:48,144
Now that I'm in L.A., I go to parties.
The kind where if a girl is named Jill...

19
00:03:48,436 --> 00:03:50,938
...she spells it J-Y-L-L-E, that bullshit.

20
00:03:51,522 --> 00:03:55,818
That's me there. My name's
Harry Lockhart, I'll be your narrator.

21
00:03:55,985 --> 00:03:57,361
Welcome to L.A.

22
00:03:57,486 --> 00:03:58,821
Welcome to the party.

23
00:04:12,710 --> 00:04:16,130
The guy smoking, that's Dabney Shaw,
my producer. He discovered me.

24
00:04:16,255 --> 00:04:20,384
The man with him is Perry Van Shrike,
a.k.a. Gay Perry.

25
00:04:20,635 --> 00:04:24,180
Honest-to-God private eye,
consults in film, TV. Just incorporated.

26
00:04:24,388 --> 00:04:26,807
He's bigtime. Also, he's gay.

27
00:04:26,974 --> 00:04:28,184
Don't start, Perry, huh?

28
00:04:28,434 --> 00:04:31,479
I seen you play ball. You're tough.
But you see a naked guy...

29
00:04:31,687 --> 00:04:33,231
...your brain says, "I want that. "

30
00:04:33,481 --> 00:04:36,776
I don't make that leap. It's like,
"Look, there's an elephant. Quick...

31
00:04:36,943 --> 00:04:39,820
...let's drain its blood
to paint my boathouse. "

32
00:04:39,987 --> 00:04:42,949
It's just that that's not the first thing
you think of.

33
00:04:43,157 --> 00:04:44,784
L.A.

34
00:04:45,034 --> 00:04:47,954
By now you may wonder
how I wound up here, or maybe not.

35
00:04:48,162 --> 00:04:51,165
Maybe you wonder how Silly Putty
picks shit up from comic books.

36
00:04:51,374 --> 00:04:54,418
Point is, I don't see another
goddamn narrator, so pipe down.

37
00:04:54,585 --> 00:04:57,380
How did I get here? See for yourself.

38
00:05:04,846 --> 00:05:07,014
Chloe, just run the name by me
one more time...

39
00:05:07,223 --> 00:05:09,100
...because I must be
missing something.

40
00:05:09,350 --> 00:05:12,019
I'm going nuts.
I've been through the store three times.

41
00:05:12,103 --> 00:05:14,939
Cyber Agent. C-Y-B-E-
Why don't you ask...

42
00:05:15,022 --> 00:05:17,775
- ... an employee or something?
- No, they're all busy.

43
00:05:19,360 --> 00:05:23,197
"Protocop, protector of man. "
Is that it? Protocop? He protects men.

44
00:05:23,406 --> 00:05:26,534
Uncle Harry, look around.
There are signs.

45
00:05:26,701 --> 00:05:31,539
That show was cancelled two years ago.
Just ask- Wait, are they even open?

46
00:05:31,706 --> 00:05:34,542
Yeah, it's holiday hours. Look-
Get away from the window.

47
00:05:34,792 --> 00:05:37,170
I gotta go, but I'll find this.

48
00:05:40,631 --> 00:05:42,717
- Great.
- Shit, Harry, that shit went wrong!

49
00:05:42,800 --> 00:05:44,802
- Give me the gun!
- No. Give me the bullets!

50
00:05:44,969 --> 00:05:46,971
Freeze!

51
00:05:47,471 --> 00:05:51,184
- You gotta be fucking kidding me.
- We'll stand here and wait for the police.

52
00:05:51,475 --> 00:05:54,979
Drop the gun. We didn't do anything.
We are not dangerous. Drop the gun.

53
00:05:55,229 --> 00:05:58,149
- Hey, lady, gun is not loaded-
- Richie, no!

54
00:05:59,150 --> 00:06:00,234
Richie!

55
00:06:00,735 --> 00:06:02,069
Shit!

56
00:06:07,200 --> 00:06:09,076
Oh, boy.

57
00:06:20,379 --> 00:06:21,672
Take it easy.

58
00:06:22,840 --> 00:06:26,093
Jesus. Oh, no, no.
We're not ready for you yet, sir.

59
00:06:26,177 --> 00:06:29,263
- Go wait with the others.
- Grace, do me a favor, let's take him.

60
00:06:29,514 --> 00:06:31,098
- He's ready. You're ready?
- Ready?

61
00:06:31,224 --> 00:06:32,642
Okay, come on.

62
00:06:33,684 --> 00:06:35,436
You know the setup?
Got any questions?

63
00:06:35,686 --> 00:06:38,022
He's got no questions.
Look at him. Let's go.

64
00:06:38,272 --> 00:06:39,524
Let's read.

65
00:06:42,860 --> 00:06:45,571
- Where is he? Where's Raphael?
- Where is he?

66
00:06:45,780 --> 00:06:47,031
Where's-?

67
00:06:52,453 --> 00:06:56,207
Beat up on me all night. You want me
to give up my partner, you can go spit.

68
00:06:59,752 --> 00:07:01,963
Quit acting like the good guy,
jerk-off.

69
00:07:02,129 --> 00:07:03,798
You got your partner killed.

70
00:07:04,549 --> 00:07:07,051
He was in over his head,
you knew it.

71
00:07:07,260 --> 00:07:09,303
You may as well
have pulled the trigger.

72
00:07:09,554 --> 00:07:11,138
You killed him!

73
00:07:14,350 --> 00:07:17,979
No, I didn't- I didn't kill him.
He wanted in.

74
00:07:19,480 --> 00:07:20,731
Why-?

75
00:07:21,232 --> 00:07:23,234
Why?!

76
00:07:23,401 --> 00:07:25,736
I didn't want him to come in on it.
He insisted.

77
00:07:25,862 --> 00:07:30,783
I said, "Stay at home. " But he doesn't
listen. He's such a stupid son of a bitch.

78
00:07:31,325 --> 00:07:32,785
I killed him, didn't I?

79
00:07:32,994 --> 00:07:36,998
Oh, fuck, this is my fault. I'm sorry.

80
00:07:43,337 --> 00:07:45,006
Sorry.

81
00:07:45,464 --> 00:07:48,384
Hey, good luck.

82
00:07:49,802 --> 00:07:52,597
See, this is what I'm talking about.
Old school. Method.

83
00:07:52,847 --> 00:07:55,099
- Studio.
- Brando. Put this in the pouch to L.A.

84
00:07:55,349 --> 00:07:56,601
Get Gay Perry on the phone.

85
00:07:57,143 --> 00:08:00,354
Now, get this, they're screen-testing me.
Is that wild?

86
00:08:01,022 --> 00:08:03,566
One minute, I'm boosting Xboxes
in the East Village...

87
00:08:03,774 --> 00:08:05,902
...the next,
I'm sipping champagne in L.A.

88
00:08:06,194 --> 00:08:07,987
- Hi.
- Hey.

89
00:08:08,154 --> 00:08:09,614
So, what do you do?

90
00:08:09,780 --> 00:08:12,325
I'm retired.
I invented dice when I was a kid.

91
00:08:14,202 --> 00:08:16,913
- How about you?
- I do a little acting.

92
00:08:20,875 --> 00:08:22,335
I'm gonna see who else is here.

93
00:08:22,502 --> 00:08:24,712
Anyway, that's how I got to the party.

94
00:08:26,297 --> 00:08:28,883
Now, Harmony, different story.

95
00:08:29,008 --> 00:08:32,220
Some will tell you she got here
on account of the giant robot.

96
00:08:32,303 --> 00:08:33,888
I'll show you that in a minute.

97
00:08:34,013 --> 00:08:37,099
But for me, robot-schmobot,
she was destined to be here.

98
00:08:37,350 --> 00:08:39,101
Jeez, look at those stems, will you?

99
00:08:39,310 --> 00:08:42,355
Not that that's what constitutes
why she should be here.

100
00:08:42,563 --> 00:08:44,315
Yes, racist. I'm serious.

101
00:08:44,565 --> 00:08:48,069
The other reindeer laughed at him.
Then, out of the blue, they need him.

102
00:08:48,194 --> 00:08:50,154
He's as good as a fog light
or whatever.

103
00:08:50,404 --> 00:08:53,616
You know what, so you tell me,
how is it any different than:

104
00:08:53,783 --> 00:08:56,035
"Don't talk to Reggie, he's black.

105
00:08:56,118 --> 00:08:59,622
Oh, wait, he can play basketball.
Sign him up. "

106
00:08:59,872 --> 00:09:02,291
Rudolph, Reggie.

107
00:09:03,584 --> 00:09:06,963
Harmony Faith Lane was your typical
L.A. girl, she wasn't from there.

108
00:09:07,171 --> 00:09:09,257
She grew up in a burg
in southern Indiana.

109
00:09:09,423 --> 00:09:12,718
"When in doubt, cut up a pig. "
That was the town motto.

110
00:09:12,885 --> 00:09:16,973
Like most soon-to-be-fucked-up girls,
Harmony was wicked smart.

111
00:09:17,139 --> 00:09:18,975
Of course, credit where credit's due...

112
00:09:19,100 --> 00:09:21,769
...she had a terrific mentor.
No, not her.

113
00:09:21,978 --> 00:09:22,937
Him.

114
00:09:24,897 --> 00:09:26,274
"'Go to hell, Jonny Gossamer!'

115
00:09:26,357 --> 00:09:29,193
She poured herself
into a seamless dress.

116
00:09:29,402 --> 00:09:31,821
From the looks of it,
she spilled some. "

117
00:09:32,113 --> 00:09:34,490
Jonny spoke from the pages
of cheap paperbacks...

118
00:09:34,699 --> 00:09:37,785
...and told of a promised land
known as "the Coast"...

119
00:09:38,035 --> 00:09:42,081
...and a magical city
called Los Angeles.

120
00:09:42,290 --> 00:09:45,877
As the years progressed,
she wished he was real.

121
00:09:46,085 --> 00:09:50,631
Wished that he would come to Indiana
to save her little sister, Jenna.

122
00:09:51,591 --> 00:09:55,469
You see, Papa was at her
night after night.

123
00:09:55,761 --> 00:09:57,430
But Jonny never showed.

124
00:09:58,139 --> 00:10:00,766
And then the guy
writing the books died.

125
00:10:00,975 --> 00:10:02,643
Age 16, she split.

126
00:10:02,852 --> 00:10:05,771
Took the bus to L.A.,
the promised land.

127
00:10:05,980 --> 00:10:08,566
She'd get rich and famous
and then help little sis.

128
00:10:08,816 --> 00:10:10,151
Before he died...

129
00:10:10,359 --> 00:10:12,820
...the guy who wrote the books
said Jonny was a joke.

130
00:10:13,070 --> 00:10:15,072
He wrote it for money,
and it was bullshit.

131
00:10:15,156 --> 00:10:18,492
Harmony ignored this. She knew better.
I mean, who the hell was he?

132
00:10:19,243 --> 00:10:20,494
He was just a writer.

133
00:10:20,620 --> 00:10:23,164
And that's how she got
to the same party as me-

134
00:10:23,414 --> 00:10:25,082
Oh, shit. I skipped something.

135
00:10:25,166 --> 00:10:27,960
Damn it. This robot bit.
I made a big deal, then I forgot.

136
00:10:28,169 --> 00:10:30,796
Fuck, bad narrating.
Like my dad telling a joke.

137
00:10:31,005 --> 00:10:34,842
"Oh, wait, back up. I forgot to tell you
the cowboy rode a blue horse. " Fuck.

138
00:10:35,092 --> 00:10:38,721
I don't know if you want to see it now,
but here's the fucking robot stuff.

139
00:10:38,930 --> 00:10:40,181
Can I say "fuck" more?

140
00:10:40,389 --> 00:10:42,892
Now back to Protocop,
starring Jeff Neal.

141
00:11:08,209 --> 00:11:10,294
What the-?

142
00:11:13,840 --> 00:11:15,132
Oh, my God.

143
00:11:17,093 --> 00:11:18,761
Hey!

144
00:11:24,809 --> 00:11:28,354
Sources close to Neal, who has not
worked as an actor in two years...

145
00:11:28,563 --> 00:11:30,648
...say he seemed despondent
earlier tonight...

146
00:11:30,857 --> 00:11:32,817
...during a rerun of Protocop.

147
00:11:33,025 --> 00:11:35,945
The actor, who still retains a costume
he wore on the show...

148
00:11:36,153 --> 00:11:37,655
...allegedly dressed up...

149
00:11:37,738 --> 00:11:41,701
...stumbled down the bike path and
wandered into this Venice Beach house...

150
00:11:41,909 --> 00:11:46,497
...where aspiring actress Harmony Faith
Lane was shocked to discover him.

151
00:11:46,664 --> 00:11:49,917
I'd jog by, "Hi, hello, " you know,
that sort of thing.

152
00:11:50,168 --> 00:11:51,711
- Who's this?
- I feel for the guy.

153
00:11:51,919 --> 00:11:54,213
This city can't get enough
of messing with people.

154
00:11:54,380 --> 00:11:57,675
Like putting a whoopee cushion
on the seat of an electric chair.

155
00:11:57,842 --> 00:11:59,760
- Like that.
- They always do this.

156
00:11:59,927 --> 00:12:03,806
You can never see below the waist.
It's like a Playmate in 1964.

157
00:12:04,015 --> 00:12:07,226
It was always behind the bedpost
or there's a shadow. You never-

158
00:12:07,351 --> 00:12:10,021
What am I telling you for?
Invite her to something.

159
00:12:10,688 --> 00:12:13,065
And there it was. Bingo.

160
00:12:14,233 --> 00:12:16,194
Destiny.

161
00:13:19,715 --> 00:13:22,385
You know what,
you better be her doctor.

162
00:13:23,052 --> 00:13:24,929
Walk away. Don't think, just do it.

163
00:13:25,137 --> 00:13:28,891
What, are you her brother or something?
It's none of your business, man.

164
00:13:30,560 --> 00:13:33,354
- I will fuck you up.
- No, you'll try.

165
00:13:33,479 --> 00:13:36,274
And that little experiment
will end in tears, my friend.

166
00:13:36,524 --> 00:13:40,570
So again, for the cheap seats,
do not think, walk the fuck away.

167
00:13:40,778 --> 00:13:42,822
Or let's you and me
go outside right now.

168
00:13:43,072 --> 00:13:45,449
It's past my bedtime.

169
00:13:45,575 --> 00:13:47,660
Make a choice.

170
00:14:03,342 --> 00:14:05,469
Asshole.

171
00:14:09,348 --> 00:14:11,100
You all right?

172
00:14:11,976 --> 00:14:13,728
Yeah.

173
00:14:14,228 --> 00:14:15,479
Thanks, bro.

174
00:14:15,730 --> 00:14:17,940
One day,
I'll actually learn how to fight.

175
00:14:18,232 --> 00:14:20,484
- Perry Van Shrike.
- Hey. Harry Lockhart.

176
00:14:21,819 --> 00:14:25,781
I heard about you. You're
the whatchamacallit, the consultant.

177
00:14:26,032 --> 00:14:29,243
- You must be- Anyway...
- Gay Perry?

178
00:14:29,493 --> 00:14:32,497
Yeah. Right.
Dabney calls you that.

179
00:14:32,663 --> 00:14:35,082
- I guess you guys are old buddies.
- Five years.

180
00:14:35,208 --> 00:14:37,418
Wow, five years.

181
00:14:37,543 --> 00:14:39,086
- Still gay?
- Me? No.

182
00:14:39,170 --> 00:14:43,966
I'm knee-deep in pussy. I just like the
name so much, I can't get rid of it.

183
00:14:44,675 --> 00:14:49,096
You should know better than to fall
asleep at a party. There's freaks here.

184
00:14:51,474 --> 00:14:53,559
Dabney wants you
to take detective lessons.

185
00:14:53,768 --> 00:14:56,354
- Come again?
- For your acting.

186
00:14:56,604 --> 00:14:58,439
I've got surveillance tomorrow.
You game?

187
00:14:58,689 --> 00:15:00,358
What's the person like? Crime lord?

188
00:15:00,525 --> 00:15:03,694
Please. I'm guessing some sad,
lonely little man...

189
00:15:03,778 --> 00:15:07,031
...who single-handedly haunts his own
home in the Hollywood Hills.

190
00:15:07,114 --> 00:15:09,534
That was incredibly gay.

191
00:15:09,617 --> 00:15:12,870
- Good God. Ouch.
- Yeah, you should see the other guy.

192
00:15:13,037 --> 00:15:16,290
Harry, this is our generous host,
Harlan Dexter.

193
00:15:16,499 --> 00:15:20,962
Ah, yes, of course. You're Dabney's
golden boy from back East.

194
00:15:21,212 --> 00:15:22,880
I hope it isn't past your bedtime.

195
00:15:23,047 --> 00:15:25,424
No, sir. My mom used to say
I had the neon disease.

196
00:15:25,675 --> 00:15:27,635
When the neon lights came on,
I woke up.

197
00:15:27,885 --> 00:15:32,056
I'm afraid I'm similarly afflicted.
My daughter just lived 10 years in Paris.

198
00:15:32,139 --> 00:15:35,810
She says it is heaven
for the vampire set.

199
00:15:37,103 --> 00:15:42,024
If you'll excuse me, apparently I'm
meant to help cut this monstrosity.

200
00:15:42,775 --> 00:15:46,654
Mom's gone, so it's just him
and his born-again little bundle of joy.

201
00:15:46,737 --> 00:15:48,781
- Born-again? That's precious.
- Isn't it?

202
00:15:49,031 --> 00:15:51,659
Three months ago, she was suing him
over Mom's millions.

203
00:15:51,784 --> 00:15:53,911
He called her a- Well, a bad word.

204
00:15:55,288 --> 00:15:58,916
Cunt. Welcome to Hollywood.

205
00:15:59,167 --> 00:16:01,836
Okay, I apologize.

206
00:16:01,961 --> 00:16:05,464
That is a terrible scene.
It's like, "Why was that in the movie?

207
00:16:05,715 --> 00:16:08,092
Gee, you think maybe
it'll come back later, maybe?"

208
00:16:08,217 --> 00:16:11,220
I hate that. A TV's on,
talking about the new power plant.

209
00:16:11,304 --> 00:16:13,097
Wonder where the climax will happen.

210
00:16:13,306 --> 00:16:17,143
Or that shot of the cook in
Hunt for Red October. Sorry.

211
00:16:17,393 --> 00:16:19,770
Hi, thank you for coming.

212
00:16:20,021 --> 00:16:22,940
Hey, do you know that blond gal
who just left?

213
00:16:23,065 --> 00:16:26,694
Oh, the one with the guy
that beat the shit out of you? No.

214
00:16:26,819 --> 00:16:28,654
Bye, have a better night.

215
00:16:28,821 --> 00:16:31,032
She had something, that gal,
this quality.

216
00:16:31,282 --> 00:16:32,783
Like the girl from high school...

217
00:16:33,034 --> 00:16:36,370
...the one that got away. You know
what I mean? That haunts you still.

218
00:16:36,579 --> 00:16:38,456
- Yeah, I had that.
- You did?

219
00:16:38,623 --> 00:16:40,875
Bobby Mills.

220
00:16:42,835 --> 00:16:45,046
Well, maybe you should
try to get in touch.

221
00:16:45,129 --> 00:16:47,381
I got 5 bucks says
you could still get him.

222
00:16:47,632 --> 00:16:50,885
Really? That's funny.
I got a 10 says, "Pass the pepper. "

223
00:16:51,052 --> 00:16:53,804
I got two quarters harmonizing on
"Moonlight in Vermont. "

224
00:16:53,971 --> 00:16:56,057
- What?
- Talking money.

225
00:16:56,140 --> 00:16:58,392
- A talking monkey?
- Talking monkey, yeah.

226
00:16:58,559 --> 00:17:01,896
Came here from the future.
Ugly sucker. Only says, "Ficus. "

227
00:17:03,272 --> 00:17:05,024
Detective lessons tomorrow.

228
00:17:05,233 --> 00:17:06,609
- Don't forget.
- Okay.

229
00:17:06,817 --> 00:17:08,069
And Harry...

230
00:17:08,277 --> 00:17:10,071
Come here.

231
00:17:10,154 --> 00:17:12,573
That girl, I know her.
She's done some work for me.

232
00:17:13,491 --> 00:17:15,493
Try the Domino Room.

233
00:17:15,576 --> 00:17:17,245
Where's that?

234
00:17:34,303 --> 00:17:37,306
- Hey there. I'm Flicka.
- Hey.

235
00:17:37,473 --> 00:17:40,393
- How are you?
- Good. So, what do you do?

236
00:17:42,019 --> 00:17:45,523
- I'm a private detective. And you?
- I'm a stewardess.

237
00:17:45,606 --> 00:17:47,358
- Really?
- Yeah.

238
00:17:47,608 --> 00:17:49,777
- Well, nice to meet you.
- That it?

239
00:17:49,944 --> 00:17:52,071
- Yeah.
- Yep.

240
00:17:59,162 --> 00:18:01,956
Could I have a Jack and soda? Thanks.

241
00:18:02,498 --> 00:18:05,126
Evening. Harry.

242
00:18:06,878 --> 00:18:08,421
God, I'm sore.

243
00:18:08,629 --> 00:18:12,925
I mean, physically, not like a guy
who's angry in a movie in the 1950s.

244
00:18:16,971 --> 00:18:20,266
- Didn't I see you at a party hours ago?
- Why?

245
00:18:20,558 --> 00:18:22,185
- Why what?
- Why me?

246
00:18:22,310 --> 00:18:27,190
Seriously, why not the girl over there?
Look, she's very pretty.

247
00:18:27,315 --> 00:18:28,649
Which one?

248
00:18:28,900 --> 00:18:31,152
On the left,
next to Brazilian Billy Bob Thornton.

249
00:18:31,360 --> 00:18:33,446
Oh, that's a bit of a reach.

250
00:18:33,654 --> 00:18:36,199
I'm interrupting. I feel badly.
What are you drinking?

251
00:18:36,407 --> 00:18:38,993
- Bad.
- Bad? Sorry?

252
00:18:39,202 --> 00:18:40,703
- You feel bad.
- Bad?

253
00:18:40,995 --> 00:18:44,332
"Badly" is an adverb. To say you
feel badly says that the mechanism...

254
00:18:44,540 --> 00:18:49,212
- ...which allows you to feel is broken.
- Well, that one over there?

255
00:18:49,420 --> 00:18:51,172
Between- Oh, God, nix, nix. That's-

256
00:18:52,131 --> 00:18:54,842
- The blond. The blond's pathetic.
- Because?

257
00:18:55,051 --> 00:18:59,764
For starters, she's been fucked
more times than she's had hot meals.

258
00:18:59,847 --> 00:19:02,642
I heard. It was neck and neck,
and then she skipped lunch.

259
00:19:02,850 --> 00:19:04,519
- Worst thing, though...
- Do tell.

260
00:19:04,644 --> 00:19:07,688
Worst thing is she's 35 years old
and still trying to act.

261
00:19:08,147 --> 00:19:10,608
I see her at auditions all the time.

262
00:19:11,108 --> 00:19:13,903
- It's over, baby. You missed.
- That's charitable of you.

263
00:19:14,111 --> 00:19:15,696
May I ask how old you are?

264
00:19:16,739 --> 00:19:18,407
- Go for it.
- Okay, how old are you?

265
00:19:18,616 --> 00:19:19,992
- Thirty-four.
- Yeah?

266
00:19:20,076 --> 00:19:23,663
- I'm a baby.
- Where's your buddy? The guy you-

267
00:19:23,955 --> 00:19:27,291
- The guy you left the party with?
- He's a fucking asshole.

268
00:19:27,458 --> 00:19:29,460
I just needed a ride.
Sorry, I swear a lot.

269
00:19:29,669 --> 00:19:31,629
- I know. It's okay.
- Did you know the host?

270
00:19:31,838 --> 00:19:34,131
- No.
- He looked familiar, though.

271
00:19:34,340 --> 00:19:36,217
Probably an actor.

272
00:19:38,261 --> 00:19:39,554
Go away, Mr. Fly.

273
00:19:40,930 --> 00:19:44,058
- I was talking to your friend.
- She doesn't want to talk to you.

274
00:19:44,225 --> 00:19:46,769
Sunshine, she'll be back to you
in a minute. Relax.

275
00:19:46,978 --> 00:19:48,729
She doesn't have a minute.

276
00:19:51,941 --> 00:19:54,777
Tell you what, if you change your mind
about that drink...

277
00:19:54,861 --> 00:19:58,239
...I'll be over there
with Native American Joe Pesci.

278
00:20:01,367 --> 00:20:03,870
- You are so...
- That was good, right?

279
00:20:04,078 --> 00:20:05,872
Why are you humoring him? Stop it.

280
00:20:06,080 --> 00:20:08,875
You know what,
there's an empty table over there.

281
00:20:09,083 --> 00:20:12,128
I hear it's a recommended
cheeseball hangout.

282
00:20:12,211 --> 00:20:14,547
Your mouth is a recommended place
to put a sock.

283
00:20:14,839 --> 00:20:17,300
Princess. Scary friend.

284
00:20:18,342 --> 00:20:19,802
Goddamn it.

285
00:20:19,927 --> 00:20:24,098
Harry Lockhart, are you gonna
recognize me or what?

286
00:20:24,265 --> 00:20:26,517
God! Embrey, Indiana!

287
00:20:28,895 --> 00:20:31,272
Loves snakes, afraid of spiders.

288
00:20:33,191 --> 00:20:35,943
Come on, remember?
You were Amazing Harry-

289
00:20:36,194 --> 00:20:38,571
- No, no, no. Harold the Great.
- Harmony?

290
00:20:38,779 --> 00:20:40,156
You cut me in half, remember?

291
00:20:40,364 --> 00:20:44,327
Oh, shit. Oh, my God. How are you?

292
00:20:44,535 --> 00:20:46,621
Okay, I was a bad narrator again...

293
00:20:46,829 --> 00:20:49,957
...because the kid at the beginning,
the magician, that was me.

294
00:20:50,166 --> 00:20:51,834
I don't want to put this on you...

295
00:20:52,043 --> 00:20:54,962
...but if you've been paying attention,
I shouldn't have to-

296
00:20:55,171 --> 00:20:57,507
Great. No wonder. Ma and Pa Kettle.
I got an idea.

297
00:20:57,673 --> 00:21:01,260
Why not put these two lame-o extras
in front of the mammoth fucking lens?

298
00:21:01,511 --> 00:21:03,596
Boo. Scat. Fat lady, leave.

299
00:21:03,804 --> 00:21:06,140
See there? "Harold. "

300
00:21:06,182 --> 00:21:08,809
Remember how I said
this high school chick haunted me?

301
00:21:09,060 --> 00:21:11,103
How seeing Harmony made me
think of her?

302
00:21:11,187 --> 00:21:13,731
That's because it was her.
It all came flooding back.

303
00:21:15,399 --> 00:21:17,401
How I was the one she confided in.

304
00:21:18,903 --> 00:21:20,404
While she was doing every other guy.

305
00:21:21,739 --> 00:21:24,450
It was the first time I felt
that how pitying someone...

306
00:21:24,575 --> 00:21:27,662
...and wanting to fuck them
can get all tangled up in your head.

307
00:21:27,912 --> 00:21:30,331
Overwhelming sadness.
Meanwhile, you got a rodney.

308
00:21:30,498 --> 00:21:34,377
Is that sick? I think-
Yeah, I think that's sick.

309
00:21:35,419 --> 00:21:40,299
Leaving my sister back home,
leaving her there all alone...

310
00:21:42,385 --> 00:21:44,929
Hardest thing I ever did.

311
00:21:47,723 --> 00:21:51,686
Do you remember
when we were real little...

312
00:21:51,894 --> 00:21:54,939
...and a movie crew came to town?

313
00:21:55,064 --> 00:21:57,984
That mystery flick with the guy,
Jonny what's-his-name?

314
00:21:58,276 --> 00:22:00,111
- Gossamer.
- Jonny Gossamer. Right.

315
00:22:00,361 --> 00:22:03,447
Your mom went nuts,
and she bought all the books and stuff.

316
00:22:03,823 --> 00:22:08,035
- That was- God, that was forever ago.
- Yeah, that was back in the day.

317
00:22:09,412 --> 00:22:10,788
Harry...

318
00:22:12,039 --> 00:22:14,125
...I didn't get famous.

319
00:22:16,085 --> 00:22:17,879
Yet.

320
00:22:21,215 --> 00:22:22,842
I did...

321
00:22:23,050 --> 00:22:24,927
...get to do this one commercial.

322
00:22:25,136 --> 00:22:27,555
You're shitting me. Which one?

323
00:22:27,763 --> 00:22:30,141
Well, you know the one with the bear?

324
00:22:30,391 --> 00:22:33,728
And it goes- Well, this is funny.

325
00:22:33,936 --> 00:22:36,814
- "I prefer Genaros, but-"
- "But I'm a bear, what do I know?

326
00:22:37,023 --> 00:22:38,816
I suck heads off fish. " That was you?

327
00:22:38,983 --> 00:22:41,819
- Oh, my God.
- Yeah, it was. Yeah.

328
00:22:42,069 --> 00:22:43,696
- That's awesome.
- Commercial.

329
00:22:43,863 --> 00:22:45,406
Come on, that's a big deal.

330
00:22:45,573 --> 00:22:47,658
- That's a national commercial.
- Harry, stop.

331
00:22:47,742 --> 00:22:51,537
It's nothing. There was actually this
kind of cool moment where I got...

332
00:22:51,704 --> 00:22:53,706
...to sort of do the wave.

333
00:22:56,501 --> 00:22:58,085
"I prefer Genaros. "

334
00:22:58,336 --> 00:23:00,546
- Whatever, it's nothing.
- It's pretty cool.

335
00:23:00,713 --> 00:23:03,466
- It's nothing special at all.
- Well, I think it's special.

336
00:23:04,425 --> 00:23:07,178
Punk-rock Steven Seagal
thinks it's special.

337
00:23:07,220 --> 00:23:09,889
Right there, at your 11 o'clock.

338
00:23:10,097 --> 00:23:11,557
That's dead-on, right?

339
00:23:11,766 --> 00:23:14,477
That's all right.
I had him pegged when I came in.

340
00:23:15,436 --> 00:23:19,357
Come back to the hotel for a little while,
just have one drink. Bring your friend.

341
00:23:19,607 --> 00:23:23,528
It'd just be a drink. You'll be home faster
than you can say "Jack Robinson. "

342
00:23:23,653 --> 00:23:25,821
I don't know about that. I can say...

343
00:23:27,281 --> 00:23:30,868
- ... "Jack Robinson" pretty fast.
- I'm timing you.

344
00:23:32,411 --> 00:23:34,372
Jack Robinson.

345
00:24:03,025 --> 00:24:05,778
- Do you have any idea what time it is?
- I'm really sorry.

346
00:24:05,945 --> 00:24:08,573
God, you still look great.
You're just stunning. I like-

347
00:24:08,781 --> 00:24:10,575
- Why are you here?
- Good question.

348
00:24:10,741 --> 00:24:13,161
Sounds crazy, but I don't remember
what occurred...

349
00:24:13,411 --> 00:24:15,371
...between the hours of 2 and 5,
a blur.

350
00:24:15,580 --> 00:24:17,540
- Really? Where's Marleah?
- Marleah?

351
00:24:17,748 --> 00:24:20,459
- The girl you...
- Marleah fell asleep at my place...

352
00:24:20,626 --> 00:24:22,170
...and I didn't see you leave-

353
00:24:22,336 --> 00:24:24,672
I left when you had your tongue
down her throat.

354
00:24:24,839 --> 00:24:26,215
- I did?
- Yeah.

355
00:24:26,382 --> 00:24:28,718
God. No, wrong throat, wrong woman.
That's bad.

356
00:24:28,926 --> 00:24:31,095
Yeah, that's bad.
You got 10 seconds, Harry.

357
00:24:31,304 --> 00:24:33,264
Oh, boy, pressure, pressure.
I came here...

358
00:24:33,514 --> 00:24:36,017
...because I think
you're intelligent and attractive-

359
00:24:36,184 --> 00:24:39,687
That's plenty. Stop. Oh, my God!
I can't believe you'd come here...

360
00:24:39,770 --> 00:24:42,481
...to tell me you like me
after you fucked my friend!

361
00:24:42,690 --> 00:24:45,109
That's just it, I didn't.
I believe that I did not.

362
00:24:45,276 --> 00:24:46,903
What? You said you don't remember!

363
00:24:47,195 --> 00:24:50,615
If I don't remember because I was drunk,
how could I have gotten it up?

364
00:24:50,781 --> 00:24:52,742
I know this is outrageous
and not normal.

365
00:24:52,867 --> 00:24:56,746
I'm not pretending that I'm normal.
I just chickened out-

366
00:24:57,288 --> 00:25:01,042
Moron. Why? Why? Why?

367
00:25:30,655 --> 00:25:34,075
And the plots, they all have this thing,
this formula that was so cool.

368
00:25:34,325 --> 00:25:36,577
Seriously, I would go through one
in a day.

369
00:25:36,786 --> 00:25:40,331
- A whole book in one day. Wow.
- See, Gossamer would always take on...

370
00:25:40,456 --> 00:25:42,625
...two cases
that were seemingly unrelated.

371
00:25:42,834 --> 00:25:45,169
One's normal
and the other's some wild shit...

372
00:25:45,336 --> 00:25:47,505
...then you'd find out
that they're connected.

373
00:25:47,755 --> 00:25:49,757
That it's all one case.

374
00:25:49,924 --> 00:25:51,384
That's the essence of the-

375
00:25:51,509 --> 00:25:56,013
Yeah, I get that all the time. Would
you mind not rooting around in there?

376
00:25:56,848 --> 00:25:58,224
It's tiny. Is this real?

377
00:25:58,391 --> 00:26:01,602
Yeah, it's a derringer. It's loaded.

378
00:26:02,019 --> 00:26:05,273
- I call it my faggot gun.
- Because?

379
00:26:05,481 --> 00:26:09,527
It's only good for a couple shots, then
you gotta drop it for something better.

380
00:26:10,862 --> 00:26:12,780
You asked, chief.

381
00:26:14,240 --> 00:26:16,325
On with our lesson.

382
00:26:17,034 --> 00:26:21,330
- My client is one Allison Ames. A-M-E-S.
- Ames.

383
00:26:21,539 --> 00:26:24,625
Female. She hired me
to do some video surveillance.

384
00:26:24,876 --> 00:26:26,460
- Is she a looker?
- Oh, man.

385
00:26:26,586 --> 00:26:29,881
She opens the door,
she got nothing on but the radio.

386
00:26:30,464 --> 00:26:32,425
Invites me to sit down,
sits on my lap...

387
00:26:32,592 --> 00:26:34,969
- ...fires up a smoke.
- Really?

388
00:26:35,094 --> 00:26:37,597
No. Idiot.

389
00:26:37,805 --> 00:26:39,807
She hired me over the phone.

390
00:26:39,891 --> 00:26:42,894
- Paid for it with a credit card.
- Okay.

391
00:26:43,102 --> 00:26:48,649
Rule number one:
This business, real life, it's boring.

392
00:26:48,858 --> 00:26:51,235
- Do you have to smoke?
- You want me to put it out?

393
00:26:51,360 --> 00:26:55,531
Yeah, soon as you find a large, brown
clump of shrubs, just throw it in there.

394
00:26:55,740 --> 00:26:59,494
So you knew Harmony in high school.
You said she dissed you.

395
00:26:59,660 --> 00:27:02,079
No, not really.
She fucked every other guy but me.

396
00:27:02,330 --> 00:27:04,499
No, that's not true.
She made one concession.

397
00:27:04,665 --> 00:27:07,084
She agreed not to fuck my best friend,
Chook Chutney.

398
00:27:07,335 --> 00:27:09,545
He was my best friend,
so she gave me that.

399
00:27:09,837 --> 00:27:13,591
- Well, that was nice of her.
- Even if he asked, she said she wouldn't.

400
00:27:13,674 --> 00:27:16,594
Stay put. Be quiet.

401
00:27:16,802 --> 00:27:20,765
"Chook Chutney"? Yeah, he's gay.

402
00:27:35,988 --> 00:27:39,826
- What's wrong with his car?
- Do I look like a mechanic?

403
00:27:41,786 --> 00:27:44,455
- Are we gonna follow him?
- Where'd he go?

404
00:27:44,580 --> 00:27:48,209
He was right in front of us,
then he cut in- Where is he?

405
00:27:52,046 --> 00:27:55,341
What the hell. He's gotta be somewhere.
He turned right in front of us.

406
00:28:01,264 --> 00:28:03,808
- Jesus!
- Shit!

407
00:28:03,933 --> 00:28:05,476
Harry, come back.

408
00:28:05,601 --> 00:28:06,978
Harry.

409
00:28:07,103 --> 00:28:10,022
- There's no one in the car. Harry.
- What?

410
00:28:10,189 --> 00:28:12,400
Harry, stop.

411
00:28:13,234 --> 00:28:15,319
- I think it's going down.
- Wait, the sound.

412
00:28:15,486 --> 00:28:17,572
- Check the back seat.
- No, get the keys!

413
00:28:17,780 --> 00:28:19,991
The keys! Get the keys!

414
00:28:25,496 --> 00:28:26,706
Perry.

415
00:28:28,749 --> 00:28:30,585
Perry?

416
00:28:32,003 --> 00:28:33,504
Shit.

417
00:28:36,883 --> 00:28:38,968
Perry!

418
00:28:42,096 --> 00:28:44,515
Where'd she come from?

419
00:28:44,599 --> 00:28:48,019
She was in the trunk.
I had to shoot the lock to get it open.

420
00:28:48,227 --> 00:28:49,604
Oh, Jesus.

421
00:28:51,022 --> 00:28:53,107
God, what did they do to her face?

422
00:28:54,984 --> 00:28:58,821
- Is she dead?
- No. She's resting her eyes for a minute.

423
00:28:58,946 --> 00:29:01,282
Of course she's fucking dead.
Her neck's broken.

424
00:29:15,129 --> 00:29:17,507
- Hey, what the hell's going on?
- Shut up.

425
00:29:18,591 --> 00:29:20,968
- Hey, we got a dead girl here!
- Hey, shut up.

426
00:29:21,219 --> 00:29:23,596
Two guys in masks,
and there they go.

427
00:29:23,804 --> 00:29:25,681
What the fuck is going on?
This is bad.

428
00:29:25,890 --> 00:29:27,642
We gotta roll before the cops come.

429
00:29:27,892 --> 00:29:30,811
- Nix. We go right to the cops.
- Exactly, to the cops...

430
00:29:30,978 --> 00:29:34,649
...who'll believe that she broke her neck
before you shot her in the head.

431
00:29:34,857 --> 00:29:36,234
What?

432
00:29:36,400 --> 00:29:38,736
- Come on, we gotta go.
- Oh, God.

433
00:29:38,861 --> 00:29:41,322
- We gotta go. Go, go, go.
- Oh, God.

434
00:29:41,531 --> 00:29:43,324
Oh, God.

435
00:29:43,407 --> 00:29:46,327
- All right, we're out of here.
- We gotta go, go, go.

436
00:29:46,536 --> 00:29:47,912
Where's my gun?

437
00:29:47,995 --> 00:29:49,872
- No, I-
- Give me my gun.

438
00:29:50,081 --> 00:29:51,541
- I got rid of it.
- Say again.

439
00:29:51,749 --> 00:29:53,751
Threw it in the lake.
You wouldn't, I would.

440
00:29:53,918 --> 00:29:56,671
I got priors in New York,
so I can't be messing around-

441
00:29:56,754 --> 00:29:58,464
- You threw it away?
- It's evidence.

442
00:29:58,756 --> 00:30:01,008
- Watch it. Relax.
- Okay, okay. No, I'm sorry.

443
00:30:01,259 --> 00:30:04,220
- I got a little nonplussed there.
- This is crazy. I understand.

444
00:30:04,762 --> 00:30:07,139
- What is that? Is that a clue?
- What do you mean?

445
00:30:07,390 --> 00:30:08,850
- Do you see that?
- In the thing?

446
00:30:09,767 --> 00:30:11,018
What were you thinking?

447
00:30:11,269 --> 00:30:14,355
My $2000 ceramic Vektor
my mother got me as a special gift...

448
00:30:14,605 --> 00:30:17,900
...you threw next to the car.
What happens when they drag the lake?

449
00:30:17,984 --> 00:30:19,694
You think they'll find my pistol?

450
00:30:19,861 --> 00:30:23,447
Jesus. Look up "idiot" in the dictionary.
You know what you'll find?

451
00:30:23,656 --> 00:30:25,199
- A picture of me?
- No...

452
00:30:25,449 --> 00:30:28,870
...the definition of the word "idiot,"
which you fucking are.

453
00:30:30,705 --> 00:30:32,582
Bitch client.

454
00:30:32,832 --> 00:30:35,042
Hires me, has me witness a murder.

455
00:30:35,126 --> 00:30:37,420
- Can I use a dry towel? This towel's wet.
- No.

456
00:30:37,587 --> 00:30:39,797
- This towel is wet.
- The towel is for the seat.

457
00:30:40,047 --> 00:30:42,842
This was for your shoes.
You handed it to me for my face?

458
00:30:43,050 --> 00:30:45,469
- This is wet. Can I use a dry-?
- It's dirty. No.

459
00:30:45,553 --> 00:30:48,222
- Can I-?
- No. Stop dripping.

460
00:30:48,681 --> 00:30:51,601
Shit better be improving your acting.

461
00:31:03,696 --> 00:31:05,364
- Get out.
- Sorry about the gun.

462
00:31:05,573 --> 00:31:07,241
Whatever. Out.

463
00:31:07,825 --> 00:31:09,660
Go. Sleep badly.

464
00:31:10,578 --> 00:31:12,580
Any questions, hesitate to call.

465
00:31:12,622 --> 00:31:14,624
- Bad.
- Excuse me?

466
00:31:14,832 --> 00:31:16,083
Sleep bad.

467
00:31:16,334 --> 00:31:19,337
Otherwise, it seems like
the mechanism that allows sleep-

468
00:31:19,504 --> 00:31:23,007
What, fuckhead? "Badly" is an adverb.
Who taught you grammar? Out. Vanish.

469
00:31:25,927 --> 00:31:27,595
- I'll give you a buzz.
- Die.

470
00:31:37,688 --> 00:31:39,565
That's all right, don't apologize.

471
00:31:39,774 --> 00:31:42,985
- Blow me. You forgot this.
- Oh, thanks.

472
00:31:43,903 --> 00:31:46,113
- Hello?
- I'm trying to locate Harry Lockhart.

473
00:31:46,239 --> 00:31:48,032
- Speaking.
- I'm detective Sgt. Kale.

474
00:31:48,199 --> 00:31:50,284
Mind answering a question or two?

475
00:31:50,535 --> 00:31:52,620
Of course, no problem.
Fire away, officer.

476
00:31:52,662 --> 00:31:56,040
Are you familiar with a woman
by the name of Harmony Faith Lane?

477
00:31:56,249 --> 00:31:57,583
Yeah, what's this-?

478
00:31:57,667 --> 00:32:00,586
Are you aware of giving your number
to Miss Lane recently?

479
00:32:00,837 --> 00:32:02,922
- On a slip of paper, perhaps?
- No.

480
00:32:03,130 --> 00:32:06,050
- Are you sure?
- Well, maybe she had my number. Why?

481
00:32:06,259 --> 00:32:10,137
We're required by law to treat every
suicide as a potential homicide.

482
00:32:10,179 --> 00:32:12,390
Harmony Lane shot herself, sir.

483
00:32:12,515 --> 00:32:15,017
- Suicide?
- Yes-

484
00:32:15,184 --> 00:32:16,686
Hello?

485
00:32:16,894 --> 00:32:18,646
Hello?

486
00:32:21,566 --> 00:32:23,484
- I'll be goddamned.
- Jesus.

487
00:32:28,739 --> 00:32:30,575
Don't blame yourself. Listen...

488
00:32:30,700 --> 00:32:33,995
- ...sometimes these things just happen-
- For a reason.

489
00:32:34,203 --> 00:32:36,289
For a reason? Fuck that.

490
00:32:38,166 --> 00:32:41,169
Why? Because I fall off a building,
10 people in Baltimore...

491
00:32:41,294 --> 00:32:43,171
...survive a bus crash?

492
00:32:43,379 --> 00:32:47,675
Swell, they're enjoying Baltimore.
I'm lying here with my brains out.

493
00:32:49,093 --> 00:32:51,179
I've been to Baltimore, you win.

494
00:32:52,680 --> 00:32:54,849
Listen...

495
00:32:56,601 --> 00:33:00,021
- ...I'm really sorry. I gotta go.
- Yeah.

496
00:33:02,356 --> 00:33:04,358
I gotta go.

497
00:33:06,319 --> 00:33:07,945
I have to go.

498
00:33:22,460 --> 00:33:25,463
Genaros. Pure drinking pleasure.

499
00:33:25,713 --> 00:33:28,633
I prefer Genaros.
But what do I know? I'm a bear.

500
00:33:28,841 --> 00:33:31,636
I suck the heads off fish.

501
00:33:33,221 --> 00:33:34,972
Genaros.

502
00:33:37,475 --> 00:33:42,021
I was tired. I was pissed. I was wetter
than Drew Barrymore at a grunge club.

503
00:33:42,313 --> 00:33:45,733
I needed a hot bath, a warm bed.

504
00:33:47,610 --> 00:33:50,238
But the night had other plans for me.

505
00:33:50,321 --> 00:33:52,406
- Oh, you did?
- I got the Cyber Agent.

506
00:33:52,615 --> 00:33:55,409
- You got the Cyber Agent.
- It has all the cool weapons.

507
00:33:55,660 --> 00:33:57,078
You got Protocop coming too.

508
00:33:57,328 --> 00:34:01,082
It's gonna be worth more too
because I think he's, like, paralyzed now.

509
00:34:02,834 --> 00:34:04,085
Son of a bitch!

510
00:34:04,293 --> 00:34:08,589
See, I forgot, old Jonny,
he always had two cases. Remember?

511
00:34:08,756 --> 00:34:10,299
How are you?

512
00:34:10,550 --> 00:34:12,301
Hey.

513
00:34:14,512 --> 00:34:16,389
She's gone, Harry.

514
00:34:16,597 --> 00:34:19,308
- Yeah.
- She's gone.

515
00:34:19,517 --> 00:34:22,520
I know. Who?

516
00:34:23,020 --> 00:34:26,065
Fact is, she stole not only
your credit card, but your ID.

517
00:34:26,274 --> 00:34:28,776
We're very sorry about
the mix-up on our part.

518
00:34:28,860 --> 00:34:32,238
So are you willing to positively identify
this woman as your-

519
00:34:32,446 --> 00:34:34,323
- My sister! Yes!
- Your sister was here?

520
00:34:34,532 --> 00:34:36,617
Oh, God!
God, we haven't spoken in years.

521
00:34:36,784 --> 00:34:39,328
She's never forgiven me
for leaving her all alone.

522
00:34:39,537 --> 00:34:42,373
- I'm just gonna get you a blanket.
- I don't want a blanket!

523
00:34:42,540 --> 00:34:44,208
- But you're shivering.
- I don't care!

524
00:34:44,458 --> 00:34:46,502
You're freaking me out.
Will you relax, okay?

525
00:34:46,711 --> 00:34:48,713
- Oh, God.
- I'm so glad that you're okay...

526
00:34:48,921 --> 00:34:52,049
...but now, I don't know, you're
making me more nervous. Sit down.

527
00:34:52,258 --> 00:34:53,634
- Okay.
- Tell me what happened.

528
00:34:53,801 --> 00:34:57,346
Yesterday, Jenna,
she got into my house, Harry.

529
00:34:57,471 --> 00:34:59,473
She must have been broke,
I don't know.

530
00:34:59,640 --> 00:35:03,060
She swiped 200 bucks, a credit card,
California ID, God knows what else.

531
00:35:03,311 --> 00:35:05,146
- Right.
- Oh, God.

532
00:35:05,396 --> 00:35:06,939
- No more lies, Harry.
- No.

533
00:35:07,106 --> 00:35:08,649
No.

534
00:35:08,816 --> 00:35:10,735
Are you a detective?

535
00:35:13,529 --> 00:35:15,406
- Are you a detective?
- Who told you that?

536
00:35:15,615 --> 00:35:18,326
Flicka. Flicka.
You know, my friend? She told me.

537
00:35:18,534 --> 00:35:20,077
She told me you were a detective.

538
00:35:20,203 --> 00:35:22,580
- If you are, then I really need your help.
- Well-

539
00:35:22,830 --> 00:35:24,499
That's empty, honey.

540
00:35:24,624 --> 00:35:29,462
Okay, I know this sounds crazy,
Harry, but listen. Okay. Okay.

541
00:35:29,670 --> 00:35:33,341
- My sister's been living out here...
- Harmony's sister, dead. What the hell?

542
00:35:33,549 --> 00:35:36,886
What was she even doing here?
The lady in the lake, now the sister.

543
00:35:37,094 --> 00:35:40,431
This was two corpses in three hours.
Am I crazy? That's unusual, right?

544
00:35:40,640 --> 00:35:43,226
Yeah, looking back,
I maybe should've told her...

545
00:35:43,434 --> 00:35:45,353
...I wasn't really a nipple- Detective.

546
00:35:45,645 --> 00:35:49,023
Detective. Sorry. I should've said
something, but she wouldn't shut up.

547
00:35:49,315 --> 00:35:51,484
The card she stole from me
was maxed out.

548
00:35:51,692 --> 00:35:56,280
Right before she died, she charged over
$2000 on it. That's weird, isn't it?

549
00:35:56,489 --> 00:36:00,368
Sentron something.
Some bullshit company! Plus-

550
00:36:00,535 --> 00:36:03,913
Red flag, Harry. She took her
birth control pill for the day.

551
00:36:04,121 --> 00:36:06,207
Why would she even bother
with the pill, huh?

552
00:36:06,374 --> 00:36:09,418
She was murdered, Harry.
She was murdered. She was murdered.

553
00:36:09,585 --> 00:36:12,296
Honey, all right.
Relax, relax, relax. Okay, relax.

554
00:36:12,421 --> 00:36:14,090
Are you gonna help me, Harry?

555
00:36:14,340 --> 00:36:17,134
- I gotta check my schedule-
- If you're not gonna help me...

556
00:36:17,343 --> 00:36:20,137
...I need to get out of here,
find someone that'll help me.

557
00:36:20,304 --> 00:36:22,765
- I just gotta check my schedule.
- Can you help me?

558
00:36:22,974 --> 00:36:25,560
If you're not gonna help me,
I need to find somebody else!

559
00:36:25,685 --> 00:36:28,604
- My caseload is pretty-
- Oh, Harry, thank you.

560
00:36:57,884 --> 00:37:00,136
Yuck, come on.

561
00:37:12,190 --> 00:37:14,984
- It was nothing. I didn't do anything.
- What are you doing?

562
00:37:15,109 --> 00:37:17,570
- I didn't do anything.
- You were grabbing my tit.

563
00:37:17,737 --> 00:37:20,198
No, there was a spider.
There was a big spider.

564
00:37:20,448 --> 00:37:23,075
- Oh, please, whatever.
- I swear to God.

565
00:37:23,242 --> 00:37:28,122
Look, I'll find it. I'll find the thing.
Where are you? Fuzzy little bitch.

566
00:37:28,372 --> 00:37:31,751
- Whatever. It's okay, I believe you.
- Clearly, you don't.

567
00:37:32,043 --> 00:37:35,379
Look, Harry, you grabbed my tit.
It's life, all right? It's no biggie.

568
00:37:37,006 --> 00:37:41,093
No biggie? Guy grabs your tit,
"That's life, no biggie"?

569
00:37:41,385 --> 00:37:44,430
I mean, what kind of talk is that?

570
00:37:44,555 --> 00:37:47,975
No, you tell me. What kind of talk
is that? I can't believe you.

571
00:37:48,059 --> 00:37:51,062
I can't believe that
that's the reaction that-

572
00:37:55,942 --> 00:37:57,360
See there?

573
00:37:57,693 --> 00:37:59,278
Yeah.

574
00:37:59,403 --> 00:38:03,032
- I trust you.
- Right.

575
00:38:03,324 --> 00:38:06,994
What is your problem? I'm letting you
off the hook. You didn't do anything.

576
00:38:07,078 --> 00:38:08,579
No, but you thought I did.

577
00:38:08,955 --> 00:38:12,291
Do you get it? I'm on the hook. The hook
is my home. Do you understand?

578
00:38:12,667 --> 00:38:16,879
Listen to me. I grab your tit,
it's a fucking biggie!

579
00:38:17,088 --> 00:38:19,340
That came out wrong.
But what I'm saying is...

580
00:38:19,590 --> 00:38:23,553
...you act like, "Oops, it's an okay lapse.
You know, everybody does it. "

581
00:38:24,345 --> 00:38:26,681
What the fuck kind of guys
you hang out with here?

582
00:38:26,889 --> 00:38:29,559
I mean, are you the kind of girl
who like, you know...?

583
00:38:29,809 --> 00:38:31,769
Who what, Harry?

584
00:38:33,020 --> 00:38:34,730
Who what?

585
00:38:36,941 --> 00:38:38,651
Forget it.

586
00:38:39,402 --> 00:38:41,696
I'm sorry, just relax.
Just get some rest, okay?

587
00:38:41,863 --> 00:38:46,075
Okay, we'll start on your case
tomorrow. All right?

588
00:38:46,284 --> 00:38:48,077
- Afternoon good?
- Whatever, Harry.

589
00:38:48,244 --> 00:38:49,620
- I'm going.
- Okay.

590
00:38:49,787 --> 00:38:53,166
- I'm taking some sweats, all right?
- Yeah, anything you want to borrow.

591
00:38:53,374 --> 00:38:56,419
- I'll give them back.
- Yeah. Yeah, anything in the drawer.

592
00:38:56,460 --> 00:38:58,462
If it's in the drawer, it's clean.

593
00:38:59,839 --> 00:39:01,215
Night, Harry.

594
00:39:04,010 --> 00:39:05,595
Harry?

595
00:39:06,929 --> 00:39:08,681
This is...

596
00:39:08,806 --> 00:39:11,851
- This is really great.
- Isn't it?

597
00:39:12,018 --> 00:39:15,354
- I'm leaving.
- Yeah, some nice rest.

598
00:39:15,563 --> 00:39:16,856
Bye.

599
00:39:17,440 --> 00:39:19,525
Fuck off-!

600
00:39:20,026 --> 00:39:22,695
Say again? They gave her back?

601
00:39:22,820 --> 00:39:25,740
Yes. She's in my shower.
I'm looking at her, for chrissake.

602
00:39:25,865 --> 00:39:28,075
That's impossible.
They don't even know you.

603
00:39:28,201 --> 00:39:32,997
You're right. The body can't be here.
This is all a dream. There's Elmo the elf.

604
00:39:33,206 --> 00:39:35,291
- Shut up. How did they get in?
- I don't know.

605
00:39:35,500 --> 00:39:37,710
How am I supposed to know?
Fire escape, maybe.

606
00:39:37,877 --> 00:39:41,589
Okay, first things first. We gotta move
her somewhere. You got gloves?

607
00:39:41,756 --> 00:39:43,633
- Excuse me?
- Gloves. Do you have gloves?

608
00:39:43,841 --> 00:39:47,887
You have to move her. If it's a frame-up,
some asshole's calling the cops on you.

609
00:39:48,137 --> 00:39:50,932
Do this: Wrap up the body
in a blanket, a sheet, anything.

610
00:39:51,140 --> 00:39:54,393
- Okay, any particular kind of gloves?
- Yes, fawn.

611
00:39:54,560 --> 00:39:56,020
Will you fucking hurry?

612
00:39:56,103 --> 00:39:57,522
- Perry?
- Yeah?

613
00:39:57,730 --> 00:39:59,815
- I peed on it.
- What? You peed on what?

614
00:39:59,941 --> 00:40:02,735
I peed on the corpse.
Can they do, like, an ID from that?

615
00:40:02,819 --> 00:40:05,738
- I'm sorry, you peed on-?
- On the corpse. My question is-

616
00:40:05,905 --> 00:40:07,615
No, my question. I get to go first.

617
00:40:07,782 --> 00:40:10,117
Why in poo-perfect hell
would you pee on a corpse?

618
00:40:10,326 --> 00:40:12,119
It's not like I did it for kicks.

619
00:40:12,328 --> 00:40:14,997
You said this doesn't happen.
This is your fault!

620
00:40:15,248 --> 00:40:18,459
Shut up and listen.
First, we have to wrap the body.

621
00:40:18,626 --> 00:40:20,419
Second, you've got to find the gun.

622
00:40:20,628 --> 00:40:23,422
- Say this with me, "Find the gun. "
- Find the gun.

623
00:40:23,673 --> 00:40:25,299
Damn it, I threw it in the lake.

624
00:40:25,508 --> 00:40:28,803
Not my gun, idiot. They dropped
the body on you, it's a frame-up.

625
00:40:28,886 --> 00:40:31,597
Then they also have planted a gun,
trust me. Move it.

626
00:40:31,806 --> 00:40:34,100
I'll be there in four minutes.

627
00:40:52,451 --> 00:40:58,666
Caller specified room 714, some sort of
brawl or something. Violent.

628
00:40:58,916 --> 00:41:01,919
Yeah, 714. Lockhart.

629
00:41:02,170 --> 00:41:05,715
- Let me get you the key.
- Actually, it's not 714, it's 514.

630
00:41:05,882 --> 00:41:08,301
I was just up there,
and it's really noisy.

631
00:41:08,467 --> 00:41:11,554
- Let's get the key.
- Yep, pretty awful.

632
00:41:22,899 --> 00:41:25,401
- Don't answer that.
- Yeah, duh.

633
00:41:25,818 --> 00:41:27,820
- That it?
- No, that's the corpse...

634
00:41:27,862 --> 00:41:29,864
...from the last guy who stayed here.

635
00:41:29,947 --> 00:41:31,365
Fuck off. Was there a gun?

636
00:41:31,574 --> 00:41:34,494
Yeah, it's right here. Perry,
sons of bitches made us, made me.

637
00:41:34,660 --> 00:41:37,788
I'm in town for two days, they know
who I am and where to find me.

638
00:41:37,997 --> 00:41:41,876
- That's impossible.
- Yeah, it's totally nuts. Back stairway.

639
00:41:43,503 --> 00:41:47,006
I forgot to tell you, Harmony's alive.
She thinks her sister was murdered.

640
00:41:47,173 --> 00:41:49,091
- Come again?
- Never mind.

641
00:42:04,815 --> 00:42:07,860
See, these dudes tonight,
they see two assholes out of nowhere.

642
00:42:07,902 --> 00:42:10,363
- What do they think?
- They think we know something.

643
00:42:10,655 --> 00:42:13,741
They panic. They got a body,
they've gotta dispose of the evidence.

644
00:42:13,991 --> 00:42:15,827
In my shower?
Come on, you said real life.

645
00:42:16,077 --> 00:42:20,373
- They were setting you up, dummy.
- They're not setting me up. Shut up.

646
00:42:20,540 --> 00:42:22,875
You change your tune
every five minutes.

647
00:42:22,959 --> 00:42:25,253
- Kiss me.
- What? No, no, no.

648
00:42:28,798 --> 00:42:31,926
Check out Doris and Lucinda
over here.

649
00:42:39,642 --> 00:42:40,977
These lessons suck.

650
00:42:41,185 --> 00:42:44,438
I quit. This is not being a detective.
Corpses floating in lakes...

651
00:42:44,647 --> 00:42:48,609
...people kissing people. This is wrong.
This is every shade of wrong.

652
00:42:48,818 --> 00:42:50,945
Somebody wanna fill me in?

653
00:42:52,238 --> 00:42:54,532
She thinks I'm a detective,
so go along with it.

654
00:42:54,740 --> 00:42:56,117
- What?
- Don't fuck me up.

655
00:42:56,701 --> 00:42:58,786
Hey.

656
00:42:59,036 --> 00:43:01,831
Do you know the cops
are looking for you, Harry?

657
00:43:02,081 --> 00:43:03,416
- They are?
- Yeah.

658
00:43:03,583 --> 00:43:06,502
I sent them to the wrong room.
I didn't know what else to do.

659
00:43:06,752 --> 00:43:09,255
You did fine.
Perry and I, we're just-

660
00:43:09,422 --> 00:43:12,091
- Hiya, Perry.
- We're just running, you know, a game.

661
00:43:12,175 --> 00:43:13,926
Perry, what do you call it?

662
00:43:14,051 --> 00:43:18,431
The old Bring Them In and Push
Them Out. That's what we're doing.

663
00:43:18,639 --> 00:43:20,016
What's going on?

664
00:43:20,099 --> 00:43:23,019
Why are you and Perry nacking
on each other?

665
00:43:26,772 --> 00:43:30,443
I sent her home believing, A, we'd meet
tomorrow to go over her case...

666
00:43:30,610 --> 00:43:32,695
...and, B, I wasn't actually gay.

667
00:43:32,987 --> 00:43:35,198
Do not ask me how I did B.

668
00:43:35,740 --> 00:43:37,533
Why didn't we just leave it there?

669
00:43:37,700 --> 00:43:40,036
Think, dummy.
A 911 call from your hotel room...

670
00:43:40,203 --> 00:43:42,830
...all of a sudden,
there's a corpse outside? Bad idea.

671
00:43:43,039 --> 00:43:46,459
Speaking of bad ideas, what's this
about you taking on your own case?

672
00:43:46,626 --> 00:43:48,753
Of all the dipshit things to do.

673
00:43:49,003 --> 00:43:50,421
Killed herself, by the way.

674
00:43:50,755 --> 00:43:52,715
Killed herself.
I solved your case for you.

675
00:43:52,840 --> 00:43:55,885
- Harmony's convinced-
- I don't care about- Listen to me.

676
00:43:56,052 --> 00:43:59,263
- Little sis punched her own ticket.
- Okay. Gotcha.

677
00:43:59,514 --> 00:44:02,850
All right, this looks good up ahead.
Time to lose the luggage.

678
00:44:10,775 --> 00:44:12,443
Sorry, sweetheart.

679
00:44:12,652 --> 00:44:14,529
You deserved better.

680
00:44:25,498 --> 00:44:27,458
Before I left,
I got her into foster care.

681
00:44:27,625 --> 00:44:31,337
I've never told you just how awful he
treated her. My dad, I'm talking about.

682
00:44:31,462 --> 00:44:34,382
I'll tell you what,
I take notes, in general...

683
00:44:34,507 --> 00:44:39,136
...so if you're just real specific,
thorough and precise, that'll help.

684
00:44:39,303 --> 00:44:42,306
I remember only lying to her one time.

685
00:44:42,473 --> 00:44:43,933
I said to her:

686
00:44:44,100 --> 00:44:47,103
"Maybe the man who is living here
is not your father. "

687
00:44:47,395 --> 00:44:50,064
You told your sister
she was adopted, yeah?

688
00:44:50,982 --> 00:44:52,483
No, I did one better.

689
00:44:52,692 --> 00:44:54,694
I told her her real father
was an actor...

690
00:44:54,861 --> 00:44:57,363
...who was in the movie
that came through town.

691
00:44:57,572 --> 00:45:00,283
- Jonny Gossamer-
- Jonny Gossamer movie. That's right.

692
00:45:01,117 --> 00:45:03,452
I told Jenna one day she'd go
to Hollywood...

693
00:45:03,619 --> 00:45:06,455
...and she'd meet her famous,
real father.

694
00:45:19,343 --> 00:45:22,263
She believed me, Harry,
and she came out here looking for him.

695
00:45:22,513 --> 00:45:25,725
Okay, this is a bunch.
I can start my...

696
00:45:26,058 --> 00:45:28,352
- ...process, I guess.
- Thank you.

697
00:45:28,561 --> 00:45:31,480
I'm on the case. Here is my card.

698
00:45:33,107 --> 00:45:35,860
- It's a magic card, so...
- Wow, "the Amazing Harold. "

699
00:45:36,027 --> 00:45:39,071
- Just say "abracadabra. "
- What happened, somebody sue you?

700
00:45:39,739 --> 00:45:42,241
It used to be "alakazam"
when you cut me in half.

701
00:45:42,408 --> 00:45:45,036
And, not to be picky,
but it was "Harold the Great. "

702
00:45:45,244 --> 00:45:48,915
No, I used to be great,
now I'm amazing. Get with it.

703
00:45:50,249 --> 00:45:52,502
Hi, it's me. You hear anything?

704
00:45:52,752 --> 00:45:54,587
No, there's nothing
in the papers, so...

705
00:45:54,837 --> 00:45:57,507
I'm busy working on Harmony's case.

706
00:45:57,757 --> 00:45:59,091
What case? Leave her alone.

707
00:45:59,300 --> 00:46:02,386
News on Channel 5, just starting.
Call me after.

708
00:46:03,346 --> 00:46:06,140
- a kidnapping gone wrong.
It is unclear why his daughter...

709
00:46:06,432 --> 00:46:08,226
...was subsequently murdered
or where...

710
00:46:08,518 --> 00:46:12,271
...for she was almost certainly killed
and then moved, police sources say.

711
00:46:12,355 --> 00:46:15,191
Veronica Dexter was reported missing
yesterday afternoon...

712
00:46:15,358 --> 00:46:18,110
...when she failed to greet
her boyfriend at the airport.

713
00:46:18,277 --> 00:46:21,447
Miss Dexter recently made headlines
when she returned from Paris...

714
00:46:21,614 --> 00:46:24,909
...and withdrew her multimillion-dollar
lawsuit against her father...

715
00:46:25,201 --> 00:46:27,870
...actor-turned-entrepreneur
Harlan Dexter.

716
00:46:27,995 --> 00:46:30,206
Mr. Dexter owns
the prestigious Dexter Clinic.

717
00:46:30,373 --> 00:46:33,960
His wife died last spring,
prompting Veronica's return to the U.S...

718
00:46:34,126 --> 00:46:37,880
...and a father-daughter reconciliation
following years of estrangement.

719
00:46:38,130 --> 00:46:42,343
Veronica Dexter,
25 years old yesterday. Paul.

720
00:46:42,718 --> 00:46:44,887
We were just at that party.
Are you telling me...

721
00:46:45,096 --> 00:46:47,723
...that the girl in the lake,
that was Veronica Dexter?

722
00:46:47,890 --> 00:46:49,684
Positive ID, scars, dental records.

723
00:46:49,892 --> 00:46:52,478
- You talked to your police guy?
- Yeah, not much there.

724
00:46:52,603 --> 00:46:55,523
The lab report came back,
no sign of rape.

725
00:46:56,023 --> 00:46:57,400
Boils down to this:

726
00:46:57,608 --> 00:47:01,487
Veronica Dexter, yesterday afternoon
about 4:30, left her home.

727
00:47:01,654 --> 00:47:05,408
Went off to the airport, pick up
some dude, old boyfriend. Off she went.

728
00:47:05,533 --> 00:47:09,162
- That was the last anybody saw of her?
- With a symmetrical, ungooshed head.

729
00:47:09,287 --> 00:47:10,830
Police ever find the car?

730
00:47:10,955 --> 00:47:13,166
No, genius, that was us. Remember?

731
00:47:13,332 --> 00:47:14,834
Oh, yeah, right.

732
00:47:15,251 --> 00:47:17,837
- The killers were at the party, Harry.
- They were?

733
00:47:18,045 --> 00:47:21,174
- The killers were at Dexter's?
- That's how they recognized you.

734
00:47:21,340 --> 00:47:24,594
It's getting too scary. You gotta bail.
Get a flight out, today.

735
00:47:24,719 --> 00:47:27,847
But I got my screen test Tuesday.
I'll go Wednesday.

736
00:47:28,055 --> 00:47:30,850
- You're not getting the part.
- Fuck off. Don't be a schmuck.

737
00:47:31,142 --> 00:47:33,769
- I know it's a long shot.
- You're not gonna get the part.

738
00:47:34,020 --> 00:47:36,606
You're not listening to me.
You won't get the- Harry!

739
00:47:36,814 --> 00:47:41,527
You're not gonna get the part, okay?
Colin Farrell wants too much money.

740
00:47:41,694 --> 00:47:43,196
Do you get me now?

741
00:47:44,113 --> 00:47:47,658
Dabney, he unearths a discovery.
New kid, works for cheap.

742
00:47:47,825 --> 00:47:50,286
Flies him out here,
high profile, parties...

743
00:47:50,453 --> 00:47:53,498
...screen tests,
detective lessons, all of it.

744
00:47:53,664 --> 00:47:55,041
You were just being used.

745
00:47:55,166 --> 00:47:57,877
Shave a couple million
off of Colin Farrell's price tag.

746
00:47:59,754 --> 00:48:02,048
Sorry, chief. There it is.

747
00:48:02,798 --> 00:48:04,300
I'm not gonna lie to you anymore.

748
00:48:06,844 --> 00:48:09,972
I understand if you wanna
take a swing at me. You fuck!

749
00:48:10,139 --> 00:48:11,849
You sissy bitch!

750
00:48:12,058 --> 00:48:13,392
Stop.

751
00:48:13,643 --> 00:48:15,728
Don't bother asking Harmony out
on your date.

752
00:48:15,895 --> 00:48:20,733
She wasn't very happy to find out that
you're not a detective, that you lied.

753
00:48:20,900 --> 00:48:22,819
- You told her?
- Pick those up.

754
00:48:22,944 --> 00:48:24,570
Pick them up.

755
00:48:25,738 --> 00:48:28,115
Why did you tell her?
You didn't have to tell her.

756
00:48:28,324 --> 00:48:31,327
- I am an idiot. I thought we were friends.
- We're not friends.

757
00:48:31,452 --> 00:48:34,914
- I was in trouble, you were there for me.
- No, I was- Stop speaking.

758
00:48:35,081 --> 00:48:37,834
I was there protecting
my employer, Dabney. Hello.

759
00:48:38,125 --> 00:48:40,211
He pays me to insulate him
from corpses.

760
00:48:45,925 --> 00:48:48,386
I'm not a nice man, Harry.

761
00:48:48,678 --> 00:48:51,055
Go home before something bad
happens to you.

762
00:48:51,222 --> 00:48:53,683
- What, are you threatening me?
- No, moron.

763
00:48:53,766 --> 00:48:56,352
Go home before the bad guys
do something bad to you.

764
00:48:56,602 --> 00:48:58,437
Right, I get it. Fine.

765
00:48:59,522 --> 00:49:01,357
Merry Christmas.
Sorry I fucked you over.

766
00:49:01,607 --> 00:49:04,694
No problem. Don't quit your gay job.

767
00:49:17,039 --> 00:49:20,126
Arriving passengers
from flight number 758 from Denver...

768
00:49:20,376 --> 00:49:22,879
...may retrieve their baggage
at carousel two.

769
00:49:27,884 --> 00:49:30,970
Hey, Flicka. Hey, it's me, Harry.

770
00:49:31,095 --> 00:49:33,264
Remember me?
What's up, honey? How are you?

771
00:49:33,347 --> 00:49:35,975
- She doesn't want to talk to you.
- Oh, no, no. I know.

772
00:49:36,100 --> 00:49:38,603
Did you ever think maybe
I don't want to talk to her?

773
00:49:38,811 --> 00:49:41,063
I just saw your really distinctive ears.

774
00:49:41,314 --> 00:49:43,483
You look different,
but it's obviously Flicka.

775
00:49:43,608 --> 00:49:45,943
- Maybe it's you I'm interested in.
- Is that true?

776
00:49:46,110 --> 00:49:49,155
Not really. Look, she must have
a cell phone, right? She must.

777
00:49:49,238 --> 00:49:52,867
- Forget it. This is between you two.
- Look, I got a ticket. I am leaving.

778
00:49:52,992 --> 00:49:55,786
I'm going back to the East Coast,
and that's-

779
00:49:55,995 --> 00:49:58,706
No? Come on,
I just want to say something to her.

780
00:49:58,915 --> 00:50:02,627
Just anything before I split.
I'm begging you. Come on, help me out.

781
00:50:02,919 --> 00:50:04,879
- I'm gonna regret this.
- No, you're not...

782
00:50:05,087 --> 00:50:07,798
...and that is a very smart suit,
by the way.

783
00:50:09,884 --> 00:50:12,220
- It's not here, that's funny.
- What's funny?

784
00:50:12,595 --> 00:50:14,305
Nothing.
It's just under her stage name.

785
00:50:14,597 --> 00:50:18,017
Oh, God. Everyone's got a stage name.
What's her stage name?

786
00:50:18,184 --> 00:50:20,937
Ames. Allison Ames.

787
00:50:21,103 --> 00:50:23,356
Okay, well, I'll just write it down
and then-

788
00:50:23,523 --> 00:50:25,608
Hey! Say that name again.

789
00:50:25,858 --> 00:50:28,820
- Allison Ames.
- Allison Ames. A-M-E-S.

790
00:50:29,070 --> 00:50:30,988
- That's her stage name.
- I just said that.

791
00:50:31,280 --> 00:50:32,907
That's the name on her credit cards.

792
00:50:33,115 --> 00:50:36,661
- How am I supposed to know?
- Fuck! Thanks, honey. Gotta roll.

793
00:50:36,828 --> 00:50:38,538
Later.

794
00:50:39,080 --> 00:50:43,501
You have reached the offices
of Sentron, Inc. Leave a message.

795
00:50:44,085 --> 00:50:47,004
Newsflash, Perry. Your client, Ames,
it was the little sister.

796
00:50:47,213 --> 00:50:48,965
Repeat, the little sister.

797
00:50:49,090 --> 00:50:51,050
That's where Harmony's
2 grand went.

798
00:50:51,175 --> 00:50:53,344
It's in your bank,
you overpriced bastard.

799
00:50:53,553 --> 00:50:55,304
Her kid sister hired you.

800
00:50:55,555 --> 00:51:01,060
Do you get this? Your case and my case
are the same fucking case.

801
00:51:01,727 --> 00:51:03,813
- Come on!
- Get out of my life!

802
00:51:04,063 --> 00:51:07,733
I'm at the airport, right,
and I run into Flicka, and she says-

803
00:51:08,860 --> 00:51:11,404
- Did I just cut off your finger?
- Yeah.

804
00:51:11,612 --> 00:51:16,200
It's on the floor, to my periph- I don't
wanna see it. Pick it up, put it on ice.

805
00:51:16,492 --> 00:51:17,994
Thanks.

806
00:51:24,000 --> 00:51:25,918
You're a genius, Harry.
You're a genius.

807
00:51:26,002 --> 00:51:29,380
Oh, my God, I'm so sorry I had to bail
on you, but I had to go to work.

808
00:51:29,505 --> 00:51:32,175
I am going nuts here.
I can't stop thinking about this.

809
00:51:32,300 --> 00:51:34,969
What's my sister's connection
to Veronica Dexter?

810
00:51:35,178 --> 00:51:38,931
She predicted that murder, Harry. She
sent you and Perry to that exact spot.

811
00:51:39,140 --> 00:51:43,144
That whole thing is wild. You know what
else is nuts? You cut off my finger!

812
00:51:43,519 --> 00:51:47,482
Oh, God, Harry,
I am so sorry about that. How is it?

813
00:51:47,690 --> 00:51:50,401
It's fine. It's all shut up.
They gave me painkillers.

814
00:51:50,610 --> 00:51:53,446
- Where's Perry? We gotta find him.
- Perry's coming by here.

815
00:51:53,613 --> 00:51:55,281
I'm working a party on Sunset Plaza.

816
00:51:55,531 --> 00:51:58,826
Remember you said the killer may have
been at Dexter's party?

817
00:51:59,035 --> 00:52:03,039
- Well, that whole bunch is here tonight.
- Honey, put me on the list, I'll drop by.

818
00:52:03,206 --> 00:52:07,460
I'll see if I can stir up the kettle, stick
out my hat, see if anyone shoots at it.

819
00:52:07,710 --> 00:52:09,712
Maybe you could put the hat
in the kettle...

820
00:52:09,879 --> 00:52:13,633
...and if they shoot at it, it'll ricochet.
Harry, you sound trashed.

821
00:52:13,883 --> 00:52:15,635
Give me the address. I'm coming.

822
00:52:18,054 --> 00:52:20,264
I showed up mildly whacked
on Demerol...

823
00:52:20,556 --> 00:52:23,309
...thinking Harmony's theory
wasn't so crazy.

824
00:52:23,559 --> 00:52:24,810
Hi.

825
00:52:25,019 --> 00:52:27,814
What if little sis had been murdered
by the same assholes...

826
00:52:28,022 --> 00:52:29,482
...who offed Veronica Dexter?

827
00:52:29,607 --> 00:52:31,692
Remember?
With the ski masks, those dudes.

828
00:52:31,859 --> 00:52:33,569
Then and there, I made a decision.

829
00:52:33,778 --> 00:52:36,948
If it fucking killed me,
I would not stop...

830
00:52:37,323 --> 00:52:39,784
...until I got, like, two more Demerol.

831
00:52:40,034 --> 00:52:44,914
No, seriously, I was on the case.
Harry Lockhart, L.A.P.I.

832
00:53:03,683 --> 00:53:05,226
- I got it.
- What do you got?

833
00:53:05,476 --> 00:53:08,521
Just now. My friend Tiff
does the video dubbing at Fox.

834
00:53:10,022 --> 00:53:13,192
- "Lord of the Cock Rings. "
- No, Harry, it's a fake label.

835
00:53:13,401 --> 00:53:16,904
Copyright infringement, she'd get fired.
It's a Jonny Gossamer movie.

836
00:53:17,155 --> 00:53:21,200
If Jenna was hunting her mystery dad,
this is where she would start, right?

837
00:53:21,450 --> 00:53:23,286
- Jesus, don't patronize me!
- I'm not.

838
00:53:23,536 --> 00:53:27,290
- You're patronizing me.
- No, I'm not. It's just a funny little buzz.

839
00:53:27,456 --> 00:53:29,959
I don't know if this guy's
your boyfriend or not...

840
00:53:30,084 --> 00:53:33,004
...but when you were in the bathroom,
he was checking me out.

841
00:53:33,212 --> 00:53:37,425
What? What is it out here
with these women?

842
00:53:37,717 --> 00:53:40,094
Please, they're no different
from anywhere else.

843
00:53:40,261 --> 00:53:44,056
They are. These are damaged goods,
every one of them, from way back.

844
00:53:44,223 --> 00:53:47,602
Take a guy who sleeps with 100 women
a year, go into his childhood...

845
00:53:47,810 --> 00:53:50,396
...dollars to doughnuts,
it's relatively unspectacular.

846
00:53:50,521 --> 00:53:53,941
Now, you take one of these gals
who sleeps with 100 guys a year...

847
00:53:54,108 --> 00:53:56,777
...and I bet you
if you look in their childhood...

848
00:53:56,944 --> 00:53:58,946
...there's something rotten in Denver.

849
00:53:59,155 --> 00:54:01,240
- Denmark.
- That too. But it's abandonment...

850
00:54:01,491 --> 00:54:04,410
...it's abuse. It's, "My uncle
put his ping-ping in my papa. "

851
00:54:04,577 --> 00:54:05,786
Then they all come out here.

852
00:54:06,078 --> 00:54:09,081
It's like someone took America
by the East Coast and shook it...

853
00:54:09,290 --> 00:54:11,501
...and all the normal girls
managed to hang on.

854
00:54:11,626 --> 00:54:15,505
Okay, everybody who hates Harry
here raise their hand.

855
00:54:16,672 --> 00:54:20,551
- See that? Obedient little bitches too.
- Fuck you!

856
00:54:20,760 --> 00:54:22,094
Hey.

857
00:54:22,303 --> 00:54:25,973
Okay, you've got 30 of my
fucking seconds, thrill me.

858
00:54:27,934 --> 00:54:29,310
All right, guys, cast list.

859
00:54:29,519 --> 00:54:32,063
Catch. That's the credit card
my sister used to hire you.

860
00:54:33,606 --> 00:54:35,566
So who's in this cinematic milestone?

861
00:54:35,775 --> 00:54:40,571
- We got a Michael Beck, whoever that is.
- He's the star of Xanadu, with...

862
00:54:40,780 --> 00:54:43,199
- ...Olivia Newton-John and Gene Kelly.
- Gay.

863
00:54:44,325 --> 00:54:45,660
- What?
- Nothing.

864
00:54:45,827 --> 00:54:49,205
Perry, listen up. I know this is
a long shot, but indulge me, please.

865
00:54:49,330 --> 00:54:51,666
We gotta lose the hat.
I'm sorry, honey, I can't-

866
00:54:51,958 --> 00:54:54,126
- God, I'm working!
- I know, but just forget it.

867
00:54:54,335 --> 00:54:58,089
Seriously, don't jump all over me.
Just pay attention. Watch it, please.

868
00:54:58,297 --> 00:54:59,632
- That's Harlan Dexter.
- What?

869
00:54:59,882 --> 00:55:02,134
- Who's Har-? What?
- Look, that's-

870
00:55:02,343 --> 00:55:04,971
He's 20 years younger,
but that's Harlan Dexter.

871
00:55:05,179 --> 00:55:07,348
Always sees the inside of a police van.

872
00:55:09,100 --> 00:55:10,393
No way.

873
00:55:12,395 --> 00:55:15,481
This kind of makes sense. He had
the Gossamer books at his house.

874
00:55:15,731 --> 00:55:16,941
Used to be an actor.

875
00:55:17,275 --> 00:55:20,611
I remember him now. 1980.
Oh, my God, I saw him like this.

876
00:55:20,820 --> 00:55:22,780
- Young.
- Where?

877
00:55:22,947 --> 00:55:25,491
In Indiana. He was there
with the movie crew.

878
00:55:25,616 --> 00:55:29,745
Remember, I told you he looked familiar.
Oh, God, this can't be true.

879
00:55:30,329 --> 00:55:34,500
And your sister has to have seen this,
so you know what it comes down to.

880
00:55:34,625 --> 00:55:37,461
You tell your sister a fairy tale
about her real father-

881
00:55:37,712 --> 00:55:41,257
And 20 years later, she comes out
to L.A. hunting Harlan Dexter.

882
00:55:44,594 --> 00:55:47,263
I've got a surveillance
in MacArthur Park.

883
00:55:47,513 --> 00:55:51,225
I gotta follow some chick around
till midnight. Do not play detective.

884
00:55:51,475 --> 00:55:53,436
This is not a book. This is not a movie.

885
00:55:53,686 --> 00:55:55,438
We got it. Do you think I'm stupid?

886
00:55:55,646 --> 00:55:57,732
You wouldn't know where
to feed yourself...

887
00:55:57,940 --> 00:56:02,820
...if you didn't flap your mouth so much.
Yes, I think you're stupid.

888
00:56:03,779 --> 00:56:07,533
Harry, don't listen to a word he says,
all right? We're getting somewhere.

889
00:56:07,700 --> 00:56:10,036
I'll call you tomorrow.
I'm going back to work.

890
00:56:10,244 --> 00:56:11,204
Good.

891
00:56:27,970 --> 00:56:30,681
- Excuse me.
- What's up, baby? How you feeling?

892
00:56:30,890 --> 00:56:33,601
- I'm just gonna-
- Come and take a walk. Walk with me.

893
00:56:33,809 --> 00:56:35,895
Great, this is fucking rich.

894
00:56:37,647 --> 00:56:40,274
Well, now, here we all are:

895
00:56:40,483 --> 00:56:44,320
- Ike, Mike and Mustard.
- What the hell does that mean?

896
00:56:44,570 --> 00:56:47,365
I'm with him on this one.
That's pretty fucking obscure.

897
00:56:47,573 --> 00:56:49,450
- I hear that all the time.
- You do?

898
00:56:49,659 --> 00:56:51,786
- Yeah, sure.
- Where? At the 1942 Club?

899
00:56:51,953 --> 00:56:55,998
- Just because you didn't get it-
- Motherfucker, I could- Slow your roll.

900
00:56:56,249 --> 00:56:59,460
This is bullshit. What will you do,
take me out here? There's sec-

901
00:56:59,627 --> 00:57:02,672
- Keep talking. Keep talking.
- You wanna know who we are?

902
00:57:02,922 --> 00:57:05,591
I'm the frying pan, see?
And my boy over here-

903
00:57:05,842 --> 00:57:08,386
He's Mustard.
I'm Mustard, baby.

904
00:57:08,636 --> 00:57:10,012
- Sure.
- He's the fire.

905
00:57:10,179 --> 00:57:13,182
- Fuck you, Mr. Mustard.
- Here we go.

906
00:57:13,432 --> 00:57:16,686
Now, me and my man, we're puzzled
lately by your behavior, such as-

907
00:57:16,853 --> 00:57:22,692
Such as why is a savvy, stand-up cat
like yourself consorting with gay men?

908
00:57:23,901 --> 00:57:26,362
Frolicking in the lake together.
What is that?

909
00:57:26,571 --> 00:57:28,739
You're the guys
who were wearing the masks.

910
00:57:28,906 --> 00:57:32,201
- You don't ask the questions.
- Don't ask questions.

911
00:57:32,410 --> 00:57:35,705
God, you just tore up my fucking
finger! I just got this fixed. Jesus!

912
00:57:35,955 --> 00:57:38,791
I bet there's a doctor in New York,
clear that shit right up.

913
00:57:38,958 --> 00:57:40,501
Clear it right up.

914
00:57:45,423 --> 00:57:48,134
L.A. don't want you no more,
tough guy.

915
00:57:48,676 --> 00:57:50,219
All right?

916
00:57:51,888 --> 00:57:54,515
- How much further to the hospital?
- Five minutes away.

917
00:57:54,724 --> 00:57:57,560
Talk to me. Our mascot,
back in high school, who was it?

918
00:57:57,977 --> 00:57:59,937
Come on, Harry, stay with me.

919
00:58:01,731 --> 00:58:03,399
Whitey, the white knight. Whitey.

920
00:58:03,566 --> 00:58:05,776
I guess it's better
than calling him "Knighty. "

921
00:58:05,943 --> 00:58:09,655
Then it'd be Knighty Knight. Soon
it'd be Toodles, and then Ta-Ta.

922
00:58:09,780 --> 00:58:13,409
- It's very emasculating.
- Harry, that's them. Twelve o'clock.

923
00:58:13,993 --> 00:58:16,204
You said it's a black guy
and a white guy?

924
00:58:16,412 --> 00:58:18,414
You're right.
Get the plate, call the cops.

925
00:58:18,539 --> 00:58:21,584
- Let me find a pen.
- No. Whatever. Watch the road.

926
00:58:21,834 --> 00:58:23,294
Are we slowing down?

927
00:58:23,461 --> 00:58:26,464
- No, I'm getting a pen.
- Are you following them? Better not be.

928
00:58:26,839 --> 00:58:30,343
- Tell me you're not following them.
- I'm taking you to the hospital.

929
00:58:30,593 --> 00:58:33,596
- Oh, shit. They're turning.
- What?

930
00:58:33,846 --> 00:58:35,097
Holy shit.

931
00:58:36,516 --> 00:58:40,686
Perry's stakeout. It's a setup. They're
going to MacArthur Park after Perry!

932
00:58:40,812 --> 00:58:43,856
Wait a second! My finger's hanging off.
We gotta move on this.

933
00:58:43,981 --> 00:58:46,776
We're gonna go save Perry,
really quickly.

934
00:58:46,901 --> 00:58:48,528
Then we'll go fix your finger.

935
00:58:48,736 --> 00:58:52,365
It'll be like, "Hey, Perry, look out. "
Boom, back in the car. All right?

936
00:58:52,615 --> 00:58:55,535
- Cool?
- Yeah. This is exhausting.

937
00:58:56,452 --> 00:58:59,163
Bingo. All right. All right, Harry.

938
00:58:59,372 --> 00:59:02,500
Twelve o'clock, that's them.
One of them is on foot.

939
00:59:06,504 --> 00:59:11,133
God, Harry. Shit, if I leave the keys,
can you take yourself to the hospital?

940
00:59:11,342 --> 00:59:12,927
- Oh, yeah, sure.
- All right, good.

941
00:59:13,135 --> 00:59:15,555
- I got the gun you gave me.
- You what?

942
01:00:12,445 --> 01:00:14,113
Perry!

943
01:00:15,740 --> 01:00:17,366
Now, where you going?

944
01:00:21,120 --> 01:00:23,206
No, no, no. Don't fight it.

945
01:00:24,373 --> 01:00:26,459
Let it happen, baby.

946
01:01:00,326 --> 01:01:02,078
Perry!

947
01:01:08,459 --> 01:01:11,546
Perry, watch out!
Goddamn it, turn around!

948
01:01:22,181 --> 01:01:24,100
Son of a bitch!

949
01:01:31,899 --> 01:01:35,278
How about that, you fucking animals!
Goddamn cocksuckers.

950
01:01:58,301 --> 01:02:00,261
- Perry.
- Where the hell did you come from?

951
01:02:00,428 --> 01:02:02,680
- He got away.
- It's okay. You did good.

952
01:02:02,889 --> 01:02:06,559
- I couldn't shoot him, Perry. Oh, God.
- You did fine. You did fine.

953
01:02:06,726 --> 01:02:08,394
We gotta go now.

954
01:02:24,577 --> 01:02:26,245
Hello?

955
01:02:37,381 --> 01:02:39,175
Anyone home?

956
01:02:46,224 --> 01:02:47,934
Hello?

957
01:02:49,393 --> 01:02:54,273
Anyone home?
I got an injury problem. Hello.

958
01:02:54,607 --> 01:02:57,860
All right, first things first.
You've gotta ditch that car.

959
01:02:58,444 --> 01:03:00,363
I know, I know. I've-

960
01:03:00,530 --> 01:03:04,784
I know you said that there was
gonna be consequences, but fuck.

961
01:03:05,034 --> 01:03:07,036
I saw him shot to death.

962
01:03:07,119 --> 01:03:12,041
- I was scared.
- Look, it's okay, yeah.

963
01:03:13,167 --> 01:03:16,796
We can absolutely
talk about it, all right?

964
01:03:17,046 --> 01:03:19,298
Thank you. Thank you so much.

965
01:03:19,507 --> 01:03:22,218
It's nothing against your boss.
I'm grateful. I just-

966
01:03:22,301 --> 01:03:23,719
I spoke to him.

967
01:03:23,886 --> 01:03:26,722
You'll never have to go through anything
like that again.

968
01:03:26,931 --> 01:03:28,599
I swear.

969
01:03:29,016 --> 01:03:31,060
Promise?

970
01:03:31,310 --> 01:03:32,770
Yep.

971
01:03:42,864 --> 01:03:44,157
Who are you?

972
01:03:45,283 --> 01:03:47,577
Who are you?

973
01:03:49,453 --> 01:03:50,913
Who-?

974
01:04:34,582 --> 01:04:36,042
Well, hey.

975
01:04:39,295 --> 01:04:42,381
So you still here, huh, tough guy?

976
01:04:43,966 --> 01:04:45,635
Oh, you got a gun, I see.

977
01:04:47,261 --> 01:04:48,971
Well, damn, you are tough.

978
01:05:38,521 --> 01:05:40,273
Sorry.

979
01:05:53,703 --> 01:05:55,538
Fuck.

980
01:06:07,091 --> 01:06:09,051
Hey. Hey!

981
01:06:09,260 --> 01:06:10,261
Sit.

982
01:06:18,102 --> 01:06:20,104
- Yeah? What?
- Where the hell are you?

983
01:06:20,313 --> 01:06:23,941
I'm with one of the kidnappers. One of
them, anyhow. I shot him. He's dead.

984
01:06:24,192 --> 01:06:25,443
Come here, you fuck.

985
01:06:25,651 --> 01:06:27,737
Wipe the place clean
and get out of there.

986
01:06:27,904 --> 01:06:29,489
I want to, but I can't.

987
01:06:29,739 --> 01:06:33,075
- So do it.
- My fingerprint's here. The dog's got it.

988
01:06:33,242 --> 01:06:37,413
- No one's gonna dust the fucking dog.
- He's got the finger, asshole...

989
01:06:37,622 --> 01:06:40,625
- ...with the print part.
- Get the finger, kill the dog, get out.

990
01:06:40,875 --> 01:06:42,835
Hang on.

991
01:06:43,085 --> 01:06:46,547
Shit. Well, I think...

992
01:06:46,839 --> 01:06:48,925
I think we're safe.

993
01:06:49,383 --> 01:06:50,885
Harry?

994
01:06:51,719 --> 01:06:55,139
- Harry?
- Hey, Perry, I shot a guy.

995
01:06:55,681 --> 01:06:58,100
I never did that before.

996
01:06:59,435 --> 01:07:01,145
Harry, listen-

997
01:07:09,821 --> 01:07:12,740
- link to the items found
in the Silver Lake home...

998
01:07:12,990 --> 01:07:15,618
...to the kidnap-murder
of socialite Veronica Dexter.

999
01:07:15,868 --> 01:07:18,412
Police theorize a falling out
between the kidnappers...

1000
01:07:18,579 --> 01:07:21,707
...resulting in at least two deaths,
and possibly a third tonight.

1001
01:07:21,958 --> 01:07:25,086
So this evening,
was it Jonny Gossamer enough for you?

1002
01:07:25,294 --> 01:07:28,840
To tell you the truth, Jonny Gossamer
always has a way bigger ending.

1003
01:07:29,048 --> 01:07:31,551
There's always the part
where the guy gets tortured.

1004
01:07:31,759 --> 01:07:35,638
Yeah, tortured, sure. Then he usually
breaks free and shoots, like, 16 guys.

1005
01:07:35,805 --> 01:07:39,225
Yeah, 16 guys. It's always 16.
That's funny.

1006
01:07:43,437 --> 01:07:47,733
So this thing, it's over, right? They say
the kidnappers are all dead, so...

1007
01:07:47,900 --> 01:07:50,403
Well, Harry, I'd be lying to you
if I didn't say...

1008
01:07:50,653 --> 01:07:53,156
...that I still didn't have
a few questions.

1009
01:07:53,322 --> 01:07:54,866
Harmony's sister.

1010
01:07:55,116 --> 01:07:58,327
If she stumbles on a murder plot,
why hire me to film it?

1011
01:07:58,452 --> 01:08:01,497
- Why not simply go to the police?
- Right. And I still think...

1012
01:08:01,622 --> 01:08:04,667
...this Veronica Dexter
father-daughter business is wanky.

1013
01:08:04,917 --> 01:08:07,920
So the whole reconcilement thing?

1014
01:08:08,045 --> 01:08:09,839
"Reconciliation," idiot.

1015
01:08:09,922 --> 01:08:14,177
She comes back to the States, drops
the lawsuit, moves in with her father.

1016
01:08:14,385 --> 01:08:17,180
- Suddenly they're inseparable?
- So, what are you saying?

1017
01:08:17,430 --> 01:08:19,599
We're gonna, like, probe deeper?

1018
01:08:19,849 --> 01:08:21,517
- Absolutely not.
- What?

1019
01:08:21,601 --> 01:08:23,895
What are you talking about?
My sister paid you.

1020
01:08:24,061 --> 01:08:26,272
- What, you're gonna bail?
- Harmony...

1021
01:08:26,397 --> 01:08:28,691
...do you want your sister's
money back? Done.

1022
01:08:28,900 --> 01:08:31,277
In the meantime, back off.

1023
01:08:31,527 --> 01:08:33,362
Before you get me and Harry killed.

1024
01:08:47,627 --> 01:08:49,212
Pardon me.

1025
01:08:49,420 --> 01:08:51,631
Hey, I lucked out.
They gave me the same room.

1026
01:08:51,839 --> 01:08:54,217
- Lucky you.
- It's pretty good. You wanna come up?

1027
01:08:54,425 --> 01:08:57,345
No, I don't wanna come up.
Why would I go up there?

1028
01:08:57,553 --> 01:09:00,348
- They cleaned it.
- The car is coming. I'm going. Jesus.

1029
01:09:05,603 --> 01:09:07,021
You know what, Harry? Stop.

1030
01:09:08,397 --> 01:09:10,316
Why'd you lie to me?

1031
01:09:12,693 --> 01:09:16,155
It was an excuse to stay around you.
So I think, in the realm of lies-

1032
01:09:16,447 --> 01:09:17,990
You are such a dumb-ass.

1033
01:09:19,742 --> 01:09:23,246
- I am so not who you think I am, Harry.
- And who would that be?

1034
01:09:23,329 --> 01:09:26,040
You think I'm- You think I'm amazing.

1035
01:09:26,457 --> 01:09:28,751
You do. You think I'm so amazing...

1036
01:09:28,960 --> 01:09:30,920
...because that's who
I told you I'd be.

1037
01:09:31,170 --> 01:09:32,713
Yeah, that was the game plan.

1038
01:09:32,922 --> 01:09:35,633
- You know what? It worked.
- No one else thinks so.

1039
01:09:35,842 --> 01:09:39,095
- My opinion doesn't count?
- No, it doesn't.

1040
01:09:39,345 --> 01:09:40,763
Because you're new here.

1041
01:09:40,847 --> 01:09:42,849
Look around,
there's younger and better.

1042
01:09:43,015 --> 01:09:45,434
I don't want younger and better,
I want you.

1043
01:09:45,643 --> 01:09:47,854
I'm such a moron. I'm sorry.
You know what-

1044
01:09:48,020 --> 01:09:50,940
- It doesn't matter, I'm going. Look, just-
- I'm such an idiot.

1045
01:09:54,527 --> 01:09:57,196
I steal shit.

1046
01:09:59,782 --> 01:10:02,034
- Come again?
- That's what I do for a living.

1047
01:10:02,118 --> 01:10:03,828
I steal audio-visual components.

1048
01:10:04,120 --> 01:10:07,456
I steal. I robbed a house.
I stole this watch.

1049
01:10:07,540 --> 01:10:11,377
It's a cool watch. It's got this
little light thing. I stole this gum...

1050
01:10:11,711 --> 01:10:15,131
...from the lobby,
because it was kind of a rush.

1051
01:10:15,339 --> 01:10:20,678
I've never finished anything
that I've started my entire life.

1052
01:10:22,138 --> 01:10:24,974
Not school, not marriage, nothing.

1053
01:10:25,683 --> 01:10:29,103
And I have this thing where,
like halfway in the middle, I just...

1054
01:10:29,187 --> 01:10:30,980
...and I cut and run.

1055
01:10:31,314 --> 01:10:34,233
Like the other night
when you were all over me...

1056
01:10:34,442 --> 01:10:36,527
...and you gave up
and just went for it with-

1057
01:10:36,736 --> 01:10:40,406
Prime example. I switched to the ugly
friend. Homely friend. She's not ugly.

1058
01:10:40,573 --> 01:10:42,742
She's homely.

1059
01:10:44,327 --> 01:10:47,580
Don't go. Please.

1060
01:10:47,747 --> 01:10:49,457
Not yet.

1061
01:10:49,624 --> 01:10:51,250
This isn't finished.

1062
01:11:00,092 --> 01:11:01,385
- Turn around.
- Why?

1063
01:11:01,552 --> 01:11:04,222
- Just turn around.
- What, my tag's out?

1064
01:11:04,472 --> 01:11:07,934
- This dump have a bar?
- Yeah.

1065
01:11:08,184 --> 01:11:11,103
- Call me "Slick" from here on out.
- That was such a good job.

1066
01:11:11,354 --> 01:11:13,231
You snagged a ton of gum.

1067
01:11:13,439 --> 01:11:16,442
- I mean, petty theft-
- Oh, Harry.

1068
01:11:16,651 --> 01:11:20,613
I really didn't need
that last shot of tequila.

1069
01:11:20,738 --> 01:11:23,741
Oh, God.

1070
01:11:37,213 --> 01:11:39,465
I just had a weird thought.

1071
01:11:39,715 --> 01:11:43,344
Veronica Dexter. I saw the body
up close. Hell, I carried the damn thing.

1072
01:11:43,553 --> 01:11:46,889
Both times, the dress was soaked
through, so it was transparent. So-

1073
01:11:47,140 --> 01:11:49,642
God, Harry,
where are you going with this?

1074
01:11:49,934 --> 01:11:51,894
No, no, no. It's just-

1075
01:11:52,562 --> 01:11:55,481
Perry said this chick was deep
into the born-again bit...

1076
01:11:55,690 --> 01:12:00,862
...so it's probably nothing,
but just if she had on underwear...

1077
01:12:01,612 --> 01:12:04,782
...I didn't see any.

1078
01:12:07,034 --> 01:12:10,496
- I guess I'm taking the couch.
- Yeah. Thanks.

1079
01:12:10,621 --> 01:12:15,168
Or you can sleep here.
But it would only be sleeping, Harry.

1080
01:12:17,128 --> 01:12:19,964
If that's gonna frustrate you.

1081
01:12:20,548 --> 01:12:22,425
Let's see.

1082
01:12:29,765 --> 01:12:32,143
Oh, Harry.

1083
01:12:33,811 --> 01:12:36,063
So long ago.

1084
01:12:38,441 --> 01:12:42,612
Didn't really turn out
the way we hoped, did it?

1085
01:12:43,529 --> 01:12:49,452
I guess if I racked my brain,
I could think of worse places to be.

1086
01:12:51,871 --> 01:12:55,583
- Is that so, Whitey?
- Whitey?

1087
01:12:55,833 --> 01:12:58,044
- Calling me a knight?
- Maybe, yeah.

1088
01:12:58,127 --> 01:13:01,130
Except for the boner.
That's not too knightly.

1089
01:13:01,380 --> 01:13:04,467
The hell it isn't.
Actually, it's nightly and most mornings.

1090
01:13:11,057 --> 01:13:12,934
Fuck it, I'm not a knight. I'm sorry.

1091
01:13:13,100 --> 01:13:15,645
I'm thinking-
I'm going nuts, so I think maybe...

1092
01:13:15,853 --> 01:13:18,022
- ...the couch is good.
- What? Stop. Harry.

1093
01:13:18,189 --> 01:13:20,316
Or I can keep drinking
until it goes away.

1094
01:13:20,441 --> 01:13:22,902
Harry, seriously,
if you're at all uncomfortable...

1095
01:13:23,152 --> 01:13:25,363
...I am more than happy
to do something.

1096
01:13:25,655 --> 01:13:27,114
- For chrissake, no.
- Why not?

1097
01:13:27,323 --> 01:13:30,326
I don't want you to offer it as-
Not, "It's a courtesy freebie. "

1098
01:13:30,660 --> 01:13:32,620
- You're so anal.
- I don't want the backup:

1099
01:13:32,787 --> 01:13:35,790
"Let me just give you a hand here"...

1100
01:13:35,873 --> 01:13:41,295
...as a kind of, like,
default backup thing.

1101
01:14:01,858 --> 01:14:05,027
You're gonna stop calling me.

1102
01:14:05,278 --> 01:14:07,071
No. You know, that's crazy.

1103
01:14:07,280 --> 01:14:09,031
I swear to God, this is it.

1104
01:14:09,240 --> 01:14:11,784
You are the dream girl.
You always have been.

1105
01:14:11,951 --> 01:14:14,453
This is destiny.

1106
01:14:14,954 --> 01:14:16,873
Okay.

1107
01:14:22,044 --> 01:14:24,964
Before we do this...

1108
01:14:25,089 --> 01:14:27,925
...I have a little confession to make.

1109
01:14:28,843 --> 01:14:33,139
My best friend! You said you were going
to drop by his house, wave goodbye.

1110
01:14:33,264 --> 01:14:35,808
I was leaving for L.A.
I was never gonna see him-

1111
01:14:35,933 --> 01:14:37,602
- He looked sad.
- He looked sad?

1112
01:14:37,810 --> 01:14:40,062
- Yes, he did.
- You slept with Chook COhutney.

1113
01:14:40,313 --> 01:14:42,815
Fuck. For chrissake, Harry,
it was forever ago.

1114
01:14:42,982 --> 01:14:45,193
Come on,
I was a different person back then.

1115
01:14:45,401 --> 01:14:47,612
- You slept with Chook. Excuse me.
- Come on.

1116
01:14:47,820 --> 01:14:49,780
- Watch your hand.
- Harry!

1117
01:15:30,154 --> 01:15:33,866
- Yeah.
- Harry, was she raped?

1118
01:15:35,159 --> 01:15:37,119
The Dexter girl, was she raped?

1119
01:15:38,204 --> 01:15:41,666
No, the ME's report showed no
indication of rape stuff.

1120
01:15:41,833 --> 01:15:43,543
You slept with Chook COhutney.

1121
01:16:01,435 --> 01:16:05,398
Wake up. Harry, wake up.

1122
01:16:06,858 --> 01:16:09,152
- Get up.
- What's up?

1123
01:16:09,360 --> 01:16:11,737
Harmony's in trouble. Get dressed.

1124
01:16:11,946 --> 01:16:13,656
Let's go.

1125
01:16:15,783 --> 01:16:19,036
Perry, it's me. Listen,
this Veronica Dexter business stinks.

1126
01:16:19,245 --> 01:16:21,455
I'm gonna go
check on something Harry said.

1127
01:16:21,622 --> 01:16:23,624
Call me. If I'm right, you'll shit.

1128
01:16:24,250 --> 01:16:25,918
- What did you say to her?
- Nothing.

1129
01:16:26,252 --> 01:16:29,255
- I don't get what's happening.
- She solved this thing.

1130
01:16:29,380 --> 01:16:33,843
That sly little minx of yours has solved
this case, and now I can't find her.

1131
01:16:34,093 --> 01:16:36,053
- You're worried.
- You're not worried?

1132
01:16:36,220 --> 01:16:37,930
Of course. If you are, I should be.

1133
01:16:38,139 --> 01:16:39,891
Now, what did you say? Think.

1134
01:16:40,183 --> 01:16:43,019
- You said something about the case.
- Yeah. Yeah.

1135
01:16:43,352 --> 01:16:44,937
What?

1136
01:16:50,860 --> 01:16:53,279
I tell him about destiny.
He's shaking his head.

1137
01:16:53,362 --> 01:16:57,325
About dream girls, he doesn't care.
I mention the underwear thing...

1138
01:16:57,533 --> 01:16:59,118
...he has a fucking conniption.

1139
01:16:59,285 --> 01:17:01,370
And you?
How about it, filmgoer?

1140
01:17:03,289 --> 01:17:05,958
Have you solved the case
of the dead people in L.A.?

1141
01:17:06,209 --> 01:17:08,711
Times Square audiences,
don't shout at the screen.

1142
01:17:08,878 --> 01:17:11,631
And stop picking at that,
it'll just get worse.

1143
01:17:14,217 --> 01:17:17,136
- This won't take a second.
- Right.

1144
01:17:29,941 --> 01:17:32,652
Hi. How are you doing tonight?

1145
01:17:32,860 --> 01:17:34,737
They gave away my crickets.

1146
01:17:38,866 --> 01:17:43,079
Excuse me, you wouldn't, by chance,
happen to have seen this woman?

1147
01:17:43,204 --> 01:17:47,083
No. I don't like him.
Kurt Cobain, he took my cricket.

1148
01:17:47,250 --> 01:17:48,668
Of course. That's sad.

1149
01:17:48,835 --> 01:17:52,171
Ma'am, I hope you won't be offended
when I ask you...

1150
01:17:52,380 --> 01:17:55,842
...if you're wearing anything at all
underneath your hospital blues.

1151
01:17:56,008 --> 01:17:59,679
Any undergarments. It's important.

1152
01:18:12,608 --> 01:18:15,111
That's the clue.
Veronica Dexter was a patient here.

1153
01:18:15,319 --> 01:18:18,739
Private mental clinic,
where even nice girls don't wear undies.

1154
01:18:19,073 --> 01:18:22,076
How could she be here and meanwhile,
she's out having parties?

1155
01:18:22,285 --> 01:18:26,455
Think. First she hates her dad, then loves
him. Has a lawsuit, withdraws it. Why?

1156
01:18:26,664 --> 01:18:28,958
- I'll tell you why.
- Oh, my God.

1157
01:18:32,837 --> 01:18:35,214
Oh, my God.
So it's two different girls, right?

1158
01:18:35,423 --> 01:18:38,968
He stashed his daughter in here,
and then he put the ringer on the street.

1159
01:18:39,218 --> 01:18:42,305
He needs someone who looks like her
to withdraw the complaint.

1160
01:18:42,847 --> 01:18:44,640
- It's been 10 years.
- This is nuts.

1161
01:18:44,807 --> 01:18:47,185
- It's right out of a Gossamer book.
- Of course...

1162
01:18:47,435 --> 01:18:50,188
...because the guy who planned
the crimes has all the books.

1163
01:18:50,480 --> 01:18:54,901
He's read them all. They're in his house.
Plus, he was in that piece of shit...

1164
01:18:55,151 --> 01:18:56,903
...movie.

1165
01:18:57,820 --> 01:18:59,739
You're telling me the girl imposter-

1166
01:18:59,906 --> 01:19:02,158
A desperate man needs
a replacement daughter.

1167
01:19:02,325 --> 01:19:04,327
Along comes a girl, Harmony's sister.

1168
01:19:04,535 --> 01:19:08,289
- Fresh off the bus, looking for her dad.
- I'd say I found my imposter.

1169
01:19:08,498 --> 01:19:10,541
Let's get out of here.

1170
01:19:12,543 --> 01:19:15,463
- So where did she go from here?
- Shut up, I'm thinking.

1171
01:19:15,796 --> 01:19:17,173
By the way, this thing:

1172
01:19:17,340 --> 01:19:19,300
Single gayest thing you've ever done.

1173
01:19:19,509 --> 01:19:22,470
- Evening, gentlemen.
- Hi, we are so incredibly lost.

1174
01:19:22,678 --> 01:19:24,305
Mr. Van Shrike, hello.

1175
01:19:24,555 --> 01:19:26,849
You look chilly. Come back inside.

1176
01:19:27,058 --> 01:19:29,560
I'm from back East.
I'm kind of digging the cold.

1177
01:19:29,769 --> 01:19:33,606
- Fuck! He's the one who said it.
- Or I can kill you here.

1178
01:19:37,360 --> 01:19:40,905
Harry, I was thinking some more
about this reality versus fiction.

1179
01:19:40,988 --> 01:19:45,952
Like in the movies, when a guy sticks
a gun at some schmuck's back and says:

1180
01:19:46,118 --> 01:19:49,288
- "Let's take a walk. " He's got a hostage.
- I've seen that movie.

1181
01:19:49,455 --> 01:19:52,917
In reality, the pros like about
five feet of separation.

1182
01:19:53,125 --> 01:19:56,963
That's so the schmuck doesn't take
the gun back and make him eat it.

1183
01:19:59,882 --> 01:20:02,343
Doesn't that suck?
I just hit you for no reason.

1184
01:20:02,635 --> 01:20:04,804
Watch it.

1185
01:20:10,017 --> 01:20:12,728
- Tell us where Harmony is.
- Fuck you, Mary.

1186
01:20:12,937 --> 01:20:15,940
You don't get it, do you?
This isn't "good cop, bad cop. "

1187
01:20:16,190 --> 01:20:19,819
This is fag and New Yorker.
You're in a lot of trouble.

1188
01:20:19,986 --> 01:20:24,532
For chrissake, who are you protecting?
It's all over. Dexter is going down.

1189
01:20:24,782 --> 01:20:26,993
- Down.
- I know about Veronica's lawsuit.

1190
01:20:27,201 --> 01:20:30,454
I know Dexter was facing ruin.
I even know he switched daughters.

1191
01:20:30,621 --> 01:20:34,000
Which, for God's sake, actually
did work for a while, till last week.

1192
01:20:34,208 --> 01:20:36,836
- Then he had to kill her, huh?
- Put a sock in it.

1193
01:20:36,919 --> 01:20:39,338
- I'm asking a question.
- If you ask questions...

1194
01:20:39,380 --> 01:20:42,133
...then it seems like
we don't know anything. Okay?

1195
01:20:42,300 --> 01:20:45,178
And for the record, it was the boyfriend,
the guy from Paris.

1196
01:20:45,428 --> 01:20:49,015
He would've spotted the fake and said,
"That's not Veronica. " Am I right?

1197
01:20:49,182 --> 01:20:51,267
- Fuck you!
- Exactly.

1198
01:20:51,517 --> 01:20:54,061
So Dexter had Veronica killed,
threw a dress on her...

1199
01:20:54,312 --> 01:20:57,773
...dumped the body and walked away
clean, except for one little thing.

1200
01:20:57,940 --> 01:21:01,194
- Underpants.
- One tiny little pair of undies.

1201
01:21:01,444 --> 01:21:02,820
Yeah.

1202
01:21:03,779 --> 01:21:07,033
You think that's funny, huh?
I'm gonna break your nose now.

1203
01:21:07,575 --> 01:21:11,204
I want you to picture a bullet inside
your head. Can you do that for me?

1204
01:21:11,454 --> 01:21:13,289
Fuck you.

1205
01:21:13,414 --> 01:21:16,209
- Anyway, that's ambiguous.
- Ambiguous? I don't think so.

1206
01:21:16,334 --> 01:21:18,961
He means when you say,
"Picture it inside your head"...

1207
01:21:19,128 --> 01:21:21,380
...is that "a bullet
will be inside your head"...

1208
01:21:21,631 --> 01:21:24,425
- ...or "picture it in your head"?
- Harry, will you shut up.

1209
01:21:24,675 --> 01:21:27,804
I don't know anything about a girl,
seriously. I was bluffing.

1210
01:21:28,012 --> 01:21:32,266
- I think that you are bluffing right now.
- Harry, what are you doing?

1211
01:21:32,391 --> 01:21:34,685
What I'm doing for the guy
who likes to bluff...

1212
01:21:34,894 --> 01:21:40,316
...is I'm playing a little game called
"Am I Bluffing?" Where is she?

1213
01:21:40,525 --> 01:21:43,152
Where the fuck is Harmony?
You want to play hardball?

1214
01:21:43,319 --> 01:21:46,072
Where is the girl?

1215
01:21:46,572 --> 01:21:48,157
What did you just do?

1216
01:21:48,449 --> 01:21:51,911
- I just put in one bullet, didn't I?
- You put a live round in that gun?

1217
01:21:51,994 --> 01:21:54,747
Yeah, there was like
an 8 percent chance.

1218
01:21:54,997 --> 01:21:58,543
- Eight? Who taught you math?
- Maybe it was more. I don't know-

1219
01:21:59,168 --> 01:22:00,962
Shit!

1220
01:22:01,546 --> 01:22:03,548
- Hello?
- Perry, is that you?

1221
01:22:03,756 --> 01:22:05,758
- Hey, it's me.
- Hi, Harmony.

1222
01:22:05,967 --> 01:22:07,760
- What's going on?
- Where are you?

1223
01:22:07,844 --> 01:22:09,345
- At home.
- You're at home?

1224
01:22:09,512 --> 01:22:12,515
I just got back. I was in the Hills
all day. Shitty reception.

1225
01:22:12,765 --> 01:22:16,060
- You don't sound so good.
- Why aren't you following your lead?

1226
01:22:16,227 --> 01:22:18,271
Oh, forget it. It's just crazy.

1227
01:22:18,479 --> 01:22:20,356
No, it's not crazy. Listen-

1228
01:22:20,565 --> 01:22:23,860
- It's right out of a Gossamer book.
- Don't talk. Listen.

1229
01:22:24,110 --> 01:22:26,279
- Eight percent.
- And you, stop multiplying.

1230
01:22:26,529 --> 01:22:29,198
No, not you. Listen, call downtown...

1231
01:22:29,323 --> 01:22:32,118
...see if Veronica Dexter's body
has gone to the mortuary.

1232
01:22:32,326 --> 01:22:34,620
If it has, see if there's
a cremation scheduled.

1233
01:22:34,829 --> 01:22:37,999
- Wait, Perry.
- Call me back right away.

1234
01:22:40,543 --> 01:22:43,379
Look, he was gonna kill you anyway.
He said so.

1235
01:22:47,258 --> 01:22:49,010
Cover him up. I'll get the car.

1236
01:22:51,721 --> 01:22:54,682
- All right, that's pretty much all done.
- Harry-

1237
01:22:54,891 --> 01:22:59,979
I got an idea. I say we take
the son of a bitch Dexter down.

1238
01:23:01,522 --> 01:23:05,485
To the racetrack and buy
the son of a gun a drink.

1239
01:23:05,693 --> 01:23:10,323
What do you say, Perry?
Oh, fuck, no fair. No fucking fair.

1240
01:23:10,490 --> 01:23:13,701
Aurelio, give Mr. Van Shrike
a little pat down.

1241
01:23:21,792 --> 01:23:24,253
Fucking maricón.

1242
01:23:27,715 --> 01:23:30,218
Toss it here. Let's see who it is.

1243
01:23:32,386 --> 01:23:34,096
We're in trouble. Dexter's got us.

1244
01:23:38,768 --> 01:23:41,229
He just asked a carpet-cleaning service
to save him.

1245
01:23:41,896 --> 01:23:44,273
Sorry, kid. Good hands, though.

1246
01:23:44,524 --> 01:23:47,527
Thanks. Used to be a magician.

1247
01:23:48,152 --> 01:23:52,615
And for 39.99 we'll carpet
up to three rooms in half the time.

1248
01:23:52,824 --> 01:23:56,285
That's a $40 value. Act today.

1249
01:23:59,413 --> 01:24:02,500
That chick in the casket,
she won't even match up with that...

1250
01:24:02,750 --> 01:24:05,795
...ringer you been toting around.
You ever think about that?

1251
01:24:05,962 --> 01:24:08,548
He did, Harry.
That's why he's cremating the body.

1252
01:24:10,133 --> 01:24:11,717
Yeah, you ready?

1253
01:24:13,427 --> 01:24:16,347
Speak of the devil. Gotta go.

1254
01:24:16,597 --> 01:24:20,143
Perry, nice to have known you.

1255
01:24:20,893 --> 01:24:22,478
- Harry.
- Harry. Yes, of course.

1256
01:24:22,645 --> 01:24:23,980
Harry from New York.

1257
01:24:24,188 --> 01:24:28,401
I hope you don't judge Los Angeles
based solely on your experience tonight.

1258
01:24:36,117 --> 01:24:38,786
I'm kind of scared here, Perry.

1259
01:24:39,036 --> 01:24:41,330
Aurelio, why don't you give
the kid a break?

1260
01:24:41,539 --> 01:24:44,041
Do unto others and all that.
It's Christmas.

1261
01:24:44,250 --> 01:24:46,419
- Who else knows?
- I don't know anything.

1262
01:24:46,627 --> 01:24:48,838
I'm not even from here, you fuck-up.

1263
01:25:01,559 --> 01:25:03,644
Mr. Dexter, the coffin's good to go.

1264
01:25:03,853 --> 01:25:06,439
Okay, let's burn the bitch.

1265
01:25:09,484 --> 01:25:11,444
You could zap his chest.
It'd be easier.

1266
01:25:11,777 --> 01:25:13,779
But we know why you gotta do
it down there.

1267
01:25:13,821 --> 01:25:16,032
You like looking at his johnson,
don't you?

1268
01:25:16,282 --> 01:25:18,034
Admit it, dude, you got it in you.

1269
01:25:21,370 --> 01:25:25,875
Enough! Look me in the eyes and
tell me you've never been with a man.

1270
01:25:26,167 --> 01:25:29,295
- Fuck you, maricón! Fuck you!
- That's what you want, isn't it?

1271
01:25:29,462 --> 01:25:32,632
- You want to fuck me.
- Stop helping. Stop helping.

1272
01:25:32,840 --> 01:25:35,551
- If you are not gay, just say so.
- Fuck you, maricón!

1273
01:25:36,719 --> 01:25:39,639
- Look at him. He can't even say it.
- Stop helping!

1274
01:25:39,931 --> 01:25:42,433
- Can't wait to have you as a patient.
- Bet you can't.

1275
01:25:42,642 --> 01:25:44,644
- This is what you want. Here.
- Shut up!

1276
01:25:44,811 --> 01:25:47,772
Take a look. You want some of this
right here? Look at this.

1277
01:25:48,022 --> 01:25:49,232
Just shut up!

1278
01:25:53,027 --> 01:25:54,612
Yeah!

1279
01:25:57,240 --> 01:25:59,700
Homophobes never check there.

1280
01:26:01,494 --> 01:26:04,831
Thank God you had a gun in there.
I thought it was a gay thing...

1281
01:26:05,164 --> 01:26:07,875
...like somehow
you guys could do that. Sorry.

1282
01:26:08,084 --> 01:26:11,087
- Are you okay?
- Not really, no.

1283
01:26:11,420 --> 01:26:14,006
Gentlemen, let's wrap it up
and get out of here.

1284
01:26:16,384 --> 01:26:19,637
- Who's driving?
- I tell you what, I'll flip you for it.

1285
01:26:19,762 --> 01:26:21,639
All right.

1286
01:26:26,185 --> 01:26:28,062
- This way, come on.
- Shit!

1287
01:26:34,235 --> 01:26:36,654
- Yeah.
- Hey, Harmony, it's me.

1288
01:26:36,821 --> 01:26:38,823
Oh, God, how did you get away?

1289
01:26:39,031 --> 01:26:41,742
I shot him with a small revolver
I keep near my balls.

1290
01:26:41,993 --> 01:26:45,663
I can't get to my car. We're near Olive
and the freeway. Can you pick us up?

1291
01:26:45,955 --> 01:26:48,708
I'm in a van with the body.
I'll be there in 30 seconds.

1292
01:26:48,958 --> 01:26:51,627
All right, be where I can see you.
Be ready to move.

1293
01:26:53,004 --> 01:26:56,799
Shit, they're on my tail. I gotta go.

1294
01:27:07,727 --> 01:27:11,272
Right there. She's right there! Shit.

1295
01:27:18,779 --> 01:27:20,448
Harmony!

1296
01:27:37,757 --> 01:27:39,842
Harmony!

1297
01:27:55,483 --> 01:27:57,360
- Harmony!
- Harry, don't!

1298
01:28:26,139 --> 01:28:29,976
Come on, we gotta go. They're coming
back around. Harmony's down there.

1299
01:28:32,395 --> 01:28:35,815
Perry, what's wrong?

1300
01:28:37,275 --> 01:28:39,277
Come on, breathe.

1301
01:28:54,167 --> 01:28:56,043
Harry.

1302
01:29:02,091 --> 01:29:03,801
Harold.

1303
01:29:28,201 --> 01:29:30,036
Harold...

1304
01:29:30,369 --> 01:29:33,664
...use your awesome might.

1305
01:29:33,915 --> 01:29:37,376
Save me from this hopeless plight.

1306
01:29:38,920 --> 01:29:41,506
Harold...

1307
01:30:31,973 --> 01:30:33,474
Harmony!

1308
01:30:46,028 --> 01:30:49,699
Captain Fucking Magic.

1309
01:30:55,538 --> 01:30:56,914
Come on!

1310
01:31:09,218 --> 01:31:10,553
No.

1311
01:31:18,603 --> 01:31:21,522
There, all done.

1312
01:31:22,940 --> 01:31:24,734
Finished.

1313
01:31:34,243 --> 01:31:35,786
Harry.

1314
01:31:38,331 --> 01:31:41,751
- Did you call me?
- Harry, you're shot.

1315
01:31:41,959 --> 01:31:44,337
No, no. Look, you want
to see something cool?

1316
01:31:47,089 --> 01:31:50,718
Cool! This stopped the bullet, Harry.

1317
01:31:58,017 --> 01:32:00,144
No, not really.

1318
01:32:01,020 --> 01:32:02,605
Oh, Harry.

1319
01:32:02,814 --> 01:32:05,441
Oh, God, Harry.

1320
01:32:08,361 --> 01:32:09,987
Harry.

1321
01:32:19,580 --> 01:32:24,085
- Hi. Welcome back.
- Yeah.

1322
01:32:26,045 --> 01:32:29,632
- How many fingers?
- Put that cat down, because I'm allergic.

1323
01:32:31,300 --> 01:32:33,970
You feeling okay? How's your...?

1324
01:32:34,220 --> 01:32:36,472
- My what?
- Well, your...

1325
01:32:36,722 --> 01:32:40,184
- Everything down there.
- I can't believe he told you that.

1326
01:32:42,728 --> 01:32:44,814
It's Christmas,
where's my present, Slick?

1327
01:32:45,022 --> 01:32:47,233
Your present is you're not in jail,
fag-hag.

1328
01:32:47,441 --> 01:32:50,236
Yeah, boo, hiss, I know.
Look, I hate it too.

1329
01:32:50,361 --> 01:32:53,781
In movies where the studio gets all
paranoid about a downer ending...

1330
01:32:53,948 --> 01:32:57,827
...so the guy shows up, he's magically
alive on crutches, I hate that.

1331
01:32:58,077 --> 01:33:01,080
I mean, shit,
why not bring them all back.

1332
01:33:02,165 --> 01:33:06,085
But the point is, in this case,
this time, it really happened.

1333
01:33:06,335 --> 01:33:08,838
Perry, like, lived.
Yeah, it's a dumb movie thing...

1334
01:33:09,005 --> 01:33:11,632
...but what do you want me to do,
lie about it?

1335
01:33:11,841 --> 01:33:13,593
So you found something out?

1336
01:33:13,843 --> 01:33:16,929
Yeah. But you're not gonna like it.

1337
01:33:18,514 --> 01:33:20,516
Dexter didn't murder your sister.

1338
01:33:21,434 --> 01:33:25,396
That's crazy. He was using my sister
to impersonate his daughter, Perry.

1339
01:33:25,605 --> 01:33:28,191
Never happened.
I talked to my police guy.

1340
01:33:29,692 --> 01:33:35,781
The ringer was a girl named Mia Frye,
23-year-old from Glendale.

1341
01:33:36,032 --> 01:33:38,451
When she wasn't impersonating
Veronica Dexter...

1342
01:33:38,618 --> 01:33:40,786
...she wore a pink wig.

1343
01:33:42,914 --> 01:33:47,293
But my sister sent you up
to Big Bear Lake, to his cabin.

1344
01:33:48,878 --> 01:33:52,799
Your sister was convinced
that Dexter was her natural father...

1345
01:33:53,049 --> 01:33:55,551
...so she started following him,
hanging around.

1346
01:33:55,718 --> 01:33:58,221
Do you see where I'm going with this?

1347
01:33:58,638 --> 01:34:01,557
One day your sister came calling,
and she saw Dexter...

1348
01:34:01,808 --> 01:34:03,643
...in bed with the pink-haired girl.

1349
01:34:03,893 --> 01:34:06,562
What she thought
was father and daughter.

1350
01:34:06,687 --> 01:34:08,940
Remember,
that's how it would appear.

1351
01:34:09,148 --> 01:34:10,566
It was too much for her.

1352
01:34:10,733 --> 01:34:15,154
First the old father,
now the shiny new one.

1353
01:34:15,321 --> 01:34:20,326
She couldn't handle it,
and she took her own life.

1354
01:34:20,993 --> 01:34:24,914
What she hired me to film
wasn't murder, but incest.

1355
01:34:27,416 --> 01:34:29,460
I'm sorry.

1356
01:34:29,585 --> 01:34:31,546
So much for unreality.

1357
01:34:31,838 --> 01:34:33,256
I said goodbye...

1358
01:34:33,673 --> 01:34:37,260
...watched Jonny's world
go back on the fiction shelf.

1359
01:34:37,385 --> 01:34:40,054
But while it lasted, brother...

1360
01:34:40,888 --> 01:34:42,849
...it was one for the books.

1361
01:34:44,183 --> 01:34:46,727
You should've told me
you were arrested five times.

1362
01:34:47,436 --> 01:34:48,980
I should be pissed.

1363
01:34:49,230 --> 01:34:52,859
You should have told me that when you
go home, you put on lady's underpants.

1364
01:34:52,942 --> 01:34:55,027
- That's cross-dressing, imbecile.
- Whatever.

1365
01:34:55,278 --> 01:34:58,906
Half those guys are straight.
Perfect fathers, love their kids.

1366
01:34:59,115 --> 01:35:01,200
How about you?
Did your father love you?

1367
01:35:01,325 --> 01:35:05,371
Sometimes. You know, when I dressed
up like a bottle. How about yours?

1368
01:35:05,496 --> 01:35:08,499
Well, he used to beat me in Morse code,
so it's possible...

1369
01:35:08,666 --> 01:35:11,127
...but he never
actually said the words.

1370
01:35:11,335 --> 01:35:13,504
- Harry.
- What?

1371
01:35:13,713 --> 01:35:16,048
Don't steal any more shit.

1372
01:35:17,049 --> 01:35:19,051
You're not a punk.

1373
01:35:22,805 --> 01:35:23,973
You bet I'll turn around.

1374
01:35:24,348 --> 01:35:25,641
You like that, huh?

1375
01:35:25,808 --> 01:35:29,103
I saw him in the commissary twice.
What is he, like 6'4"?

1376
01:35:29,395 --> 01:35:32,482
He doesn't know he's gay.
Look how he walks.

1377
01:35:32,732 --> 01:35:34,275
So that's pretty much that.

1378
01:35:34,484 --> 01:35:37,403
We went back to Indiana,
the three of us, for Jenna's funeral.

1379
01:35:39,071 --> 01:35:41,240
Don't worry,
I saw the last Lord of the Rings.

1380
01:35:41,491 --> 01:35:43,242
I won't have the movie end 17 times.

1381
01:35:43,451 --> 01:35:46,245
There is, though, one final scene
for your viewing pleasure.

1382
01:35:55,963 --> 01:35:57,924
Do I know you?

1383
01:36:02,094 --> 01:36:04,597
No. Just in town for the funeral.

1384
01:36:05,139 --> 01:36:06,516
What do you want?

1385
01:36:06,682 --> 01:36:10,770
The zoo was closed, so I thought
I'd come here and look at an animal.

1386
01:36:10,978 --> 01:36:12,522
Son of a-

1387
01:36:12,647 --> 01:36:15,441
Who do you think you're talking to?

1388
01:36:15,691 --> 01:36:17,902
I buried my daughter today.

1389
01:36:18,194 --> 01:36:20,279
No.

1390
01:36:20,696 --> 01:36:23,616
You buried her 20 years ago.

1391
01:36:23,741 --> 01:36:27,745
Harmony was right,
her sister was murdered.

1392
01:36:27,954 --> 01:36:31,958
You pulled the trigger. It just took
this long for the bullet to hit.

1393
01:36:32,875 --> 01:36:35,044
Who are you?

1394
01:36:36,129 --> 01:36:37,964
I loved my girl.

1395
01:36:38,923 --> 01:36:42,343
You fucker!
If I could get out of this bed-

1396
01:36:42,552 --> 01:36:45,888
Yeah? Well, you can't.

1397
01:36:46,848 --> 01:36:49,183
You bastard!

1398
01:36:52,687 --> 01:36:55,148
An old man that can't defend himself.

1399
01:36:55,398 --> 01:36:57,275
Big tough guy.

1400
01:36:57,483 --> 01:36:58,734
Yeah, that's right.

1401
01:37:00,403 --> 01:37:02,572
Big tough guy.

1402
01:37:16,335 --> 01:37:21,549
I prefer Genaros, but what do I know?
I'm a bear. I suck the heads off fish.

1403
01:37:29,932 --> 01:37:33,686
That's it. That's the true story
of what happened last Christmas.

1404
01:37:33,895 --> 01:37:37,565
That was some pretty harsh shit
with the old guy back there, right?

1405
01:37:37,732 --> 01:37:40,693
But whatever, he's creepy.
Fuck him. Don't worry about him.

1406
01:37:40,860 --> 01:37:42,987
Anyhow, so...

1407
01:37:43,154 --> 01:37:44,906
Thanks for coming.

1408
01:37:44,989 --> 01:37:48,618
Thanks for taking the trip to L.A.
with me.

1409
01:37:49,702 --> 01:37:51,621
If I had to sum it up,
and I do-

1410
01:37:51,787 --> 01:37:54,207
Because, you know,
it's, like, the end.

1411
01:37:54,415 --> 01:37:58,920
- I would say that this movie is about-
It's about friendship.

1412
01:37:59,003 --> 01:38:01,255
- Friendship is sacred.
- What are you doing?

1413
01:38:01,380 --> 01:38:03,090
I'm trying to wrap up the movie...

1414
01:38:03,341 --> 01:38:05,551
...and leave the people
with a message.

1415
01:38:06,511 --> 01:38:09,555
I've got a message for you.
Get your feet off my fucking desk.

1416
01:38:09,722 --> 01:38:11,808
Sorry. I work for Perry now.

1417
01:38:11,974 --> 01:38:13,726
- And stop narrating.
- Obviously.

1418
01:38:13,810 --> 01:38:16,187
That's it.
Please stay for the end credits.

1419
01:38:16,437 --> 01:38:19,774
If you're wondering who the best boy is,
it's someone's nephew.

1420
01:38:19,941 --> 01:38:21,818
Don't forget to validate your parking.

1421
01:38:21,943 --> 01:38:24,195
For all of you good people
in the Midwest...

1422
01:38:24,362 --> 01:38:25,863
...sorry we said "fuck" so much.

1423
01:38:26,113 --> 01:38:27,865
- Say good night.
- Thanks again.

1424
01:38:28,115 --> 01:38:29,867
Now, go. Vanish.